My Dear Lovey Sillies,
Sorry I've been so absent.
As you can see, though, I'm a survivor!
I love you!
Dear Sillies,
I'd been quiet about JT because things were going so smoothly and giddily. Our chemsitry was comfortable and fun; our attraction, consistently strong. He'd cook for me several times a week. We trekked to the beach, to San Francisco Bay, and many local destinations. We also just stayed in and played Scrabble and other indoor games. Wink. All in all, I've felt more joyous love for JT than I've felt for any other man in my life.
BUT (You knew this was comin') in the past month or so, he'd distanced himself and failed to communicate. My every attempt to talk only made things worse.
BUT, BUT the lovey-dovey moments and messaging continued even through this Friday evening, for 2.25 YEARS. Despite this, it's gonna be another heartache tonight and tomorrow night and the next night and so on.
When I dropped by his home yesterday, this discourse ensued:
"I was going to call you," his tone, stoic. "I'm going to stay in tonight."
"Okay, alright." Disappointed but not surprised, I ask: "Anything else?"
"No. That's all."
"Well what if I have something to say?"
"Go ahead."
"I don't know how to talk to you anymore." A bucket of tears pours down my cheeks. "Do you even want to keep me in your life?"
"I DON'T KNOW."
You don't f*ckin know?! "You have no idea how much you're hurting me."
My friends, I got no explanation, no kindness, no apology, none of the thoughtfulness that I love/d so much about JT. Not even a lousy t-shirt with the logo "He doesn't want this." Dude simply reiterated that he has nothing to say. He doesn't want "this."
I know I deserve better, my Dear Sillies.
I love you, and I know you're here and there and wherever for me through this heartache. Please and thank you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On a happier note: Happy 12th Anniversary to the IWSG! I'm into my 14th year of blogging and even more exciting, I'm slowly approaching 1 MILLION VIEWS. I can't wait to become a millionaire! We'll celebrate in sweet style. Please do stick around.
Happy Labor Day, my Dear Sillies!
Glenn-David, Jonathan, Robyn, Dawn in our Rebel station wagon, circa 1973. This photo's been seen hundreds of thousands of times - YAY! Thanks to the rebels, it was stolen from my site for youtube videos about the 1970's. Photo by our dad, Jerry Engel.
Dear Sillies,
Please be safe and well, my friends. I mean, Hilary's a threat and all. (#Bernie4ever!)
As a person who's a little...well, little, I feel for the dwarfs. They didn't even get to audition for the Snow White movie. So I brought these cuties onto our stage for an interview.
Let's give a small warm welcome to...
Dear Sillies,
It's back to school time, and I'm a strong proponent of higher education. Learning is good. Learning by doing, even better. Gentle yet decisive individualized hands on guidance (between consenting adults, of course), as good as it gets.
Keep a smile and a stash of the good stuff (chocolate or whatever sates your palate).
PS So sorry. Martha (Dad bod and all) had to make an appearance.
Love you.
My Dear Sillies,
I’m far beyond annoyed with internet creepsters. From now on, this will resemble my discourse with every creepsterino who “friends” me:
Creepsterino: Hello 👋 it’s nice to meet you and how are
you doing today?
THEN, before I respond, but after I block him, which apparently
didn't take: Can you understand what I am saying?
Me: Yes. Since you just
want to be friends like all the others, I need to know if
you are honest. Send me your full legal name, plus credit card number
with expiration date and CVC code. (Hint: This code is on the back of the card; you need to turn it over.) If you don't have a credit card, don’t worry!
I’ll just take your social security number. Next, my boyfriend will run a security clearance
check within 72 hours! Sorry for the delay, but he’s screening 286 men before
you. A woman must be careful. Surely such a nice, intellectual man like yourself can appreciate that.
Me,
before he responds: For
the sake of full transparency, this is my boyfriend. Can you understand what I
am saying?
Be well, my Darling Sillies.
May you have no creepsterino visits. If you do, I'll send my sweetheart over to make sure that said creepsterino can understand. Afterall, that's what friends are for.
Love, hugs, and chocolate!
Dear Sillies,
What's with all the Barbie World hulabaloo? Actually, it does look to be an entertaining movie. Thing is, I wasn't a Barbie girl. First is the worst, afterall. But the second sister? She's far and away the best. Bring back Skipper!
My brother cut my Skipper's hair when we were youngins. I was, naturally, enraged. Horrified. Never let it go (clearly). Skipper's hair would NEVER grow back. Sigh. Now, I'd love to give bro a high-five. I mean, come on. She's cute with a bob. It was a brilliant move, far ahead of his time.
Skipper's the cuter, smarter, sassier of 'em. Yet the second child gets neglected. Maybe because she's just plain hotter AND cooler than Barbie. And that streak of purple hair puts Barbie's basic blonde to shame. Look at her. She obviously has more personality too.
Let's not forget the other Skipper played by Alan Hale, Captain Jonas Grumby, from Gilligan's Island. "Skippppperrrr!" shouted by Gilligan every twelve minutes. So manly and competent, he never thought about a way to get off the island. I think he had the hots for MaryAnn. We all did. Am I right? She looked like Skipper!
In sum, I'm campaigning for a Skipper movie in Alan Hale's blessed memory. Ryan Gosling gets to play Ken in this one too. He's adorable. See his dancing on the Mickey Mouse Club in the 1990s. Charming cutie!
Naturally, I'll play Skipper, who'll go more ginger for this to-be hit. Can't wait.
Cheers, chocolates, and love to you!
Dear Sillies,
Let's get back to the meaning of life: Chocolate.
My oh my, do I have some divinity to share with you! It's Nick's Swedish-style Triple Choklad Light Ice Cream. Much, much healthier than other ice creams and deep fried twinkies. There's NO ADDED SUGAR, my friends. Bonus.
But how does it taste? Divine. Really. It's malty, rich, light, addictive...I love it. My beau and I finished it within two days. And we exercised restraint, I tell ya. Re-straint. (Yeah, he made strawberry milkshakes for us in between spoonfuls of this goodness.)
Dearest Sillies,
I've once again collected and randomly organized your comments from the past several months. As always, I very much appreciate your silliness.
Please do keep a smile and chocolate (or your favorite treat) handy at all times.
Love you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joanne said Glad the communication is going
well (wink,wink, nudge, nudge) and that Bernie's not too jealous.
Debra She Who Seeks said Rub that Blarney Stone til it
shines!
Elephant's Child said A sight like that means that
breakfast here has been delayed while I recover.
Mike said I sent you the picture.
Birgit said Listen her sagging tatas
probably can hold up a soaking wet towel by now.
Mike
said Is there a line? Or can I just get a ticket for a specific time?
Jeff said The smoothness of her skin may
be from photo shop or from those years she spent out of the sun and behind
bars!
G. B. Miller said I think every teenage boy just
vomited in their mouth a little bit.
Elizabeth Seckman said Not being a hater
when I ask, what the hell is the gold thing she's wearing with it? Who would
wear that to the beach or the pool?
Al Penwasser said How the mighty have fallen. Bloody 'ell.
Alex J. Cavanaugh said Yeah, I want that kind of
boring life.
Debra She Who Seeks said I see from the photos online
that Martha has learned MY secret of strategic camouflage and calculated
positioning of limbs! Never underestimate those. Oh, and good lighting!
Mike said I would love to smell your
lovely rose today.
Elizabeth Seckman said I better go check my heart
rate...
Al Penwasser said Yes, I'm not a well man.
L. Diane Wolfe said I'll dance to that.
Mary Kirkland said Whew, this was thick with the double entendre's. lol I love it.
I'll do anything to upstage Martha. Please don't tell my beau about this. It was just a kiss. I mean, it was just a photo opp. That's all. I'm making a socially relevant statement about body positivity, people! Got a huge belly? Be proud! Stick it out til that belly button can be poked into by all (consensually, of course). I'm a respectful lady.
Oh, and don't tell my beau about this either: I'm planning a big surprise for his 25th sober Birthday! 25 years of sobriety! Can you believe it? Are any of you on that journey? All power to you, if so. It's been approximately 7 years of no alcohol for me. Not because I have a problem. I have MANY problems, as you might suspect. But alcohol isn't one of them. I just decided to hone my fixation on food sugars in the form of chocolate, as you might suspect.
Love and gentle care and trust that you'll keep these secrets.
Robyn
Dear Sillies,
Serious announcement: Martha Stewart is today's Sports Illustrated pinup girl.
I asked Martha if she wore the same garb as our joint* Christmas card in 1994. *By joint, I mean that we shared one and some spiked eggnogg before the shoot. Martha was much..."looser", shall we say? back in the day.
"Oh, gaw-d no. That was just awful," Martha retorted. I mean, I agree. I used photoshop to drop me into the photo to slenderize the ole hag. It didn't help.
Actual quotes are yellowed.
Okay, yeah, color me jealous. The 81 year old self-infatuated, criminal prima donna looks hot! I can't upload the cover photo, because of all sorts of legal sh*t. But if you have a thing for ancient women whose bellies are restrained with the same amount of protection necessitated by Prince William's bald head, kindly make the purchase and let us know what you think.
Dear Silliest of Sillies,
It's May 1st, and you know what that means.
Yep, pause to smell a lovely rose today, and dance enthusiastically around a sturdy pole tonight.
Love ya, my silly ones.
Dear Sillies,
It's official. Katy Perry will perform for the royal coronation. King Charles really, really likes her. He'd appointed Katy to fulfill the role of British Asian Trust Ambassador. I know, right? So weird!
Guess what! I invited this duo to our studio today, for highly enlightened discourse. They said, "Yep. Sure. We'll do anything together." Note that these are all actual quotes, excepting the last sentence. Enjoy. I mean, apologies.
Katy grabs her boobs gleefully and boasts: I went from zero to my own hero!
Charles III to Camilla: Do you seriously expect me to be the first Prince of Wales in history not to have a mistress?
Katy: I have confidence because my research shows that I should just really trust my instincts. With that, Katy drops the curtain, and strangely animalistic barking noises ensue. Oh wait, that's Camilla.
Robyn: Will the atrocity of British Royalty mixed with the dim-wittedness of Katy Perry, British Asian Ambassador, King Charles' side salad, continue to soil Queen Elizabeth's blessed memory? We can only hope...not.
Dearest Sillies,
Well, it's officially Spring, but it doesn't quite feel that way. Does it?
Maybe this will help.
Love ya.
My Dear Sillies,
The Ides of March hath struck so...
I don't eat the corned beef and cabbage deal. Do ye?
Other things excite me, like Bernie and Ryan and my guy's shalayleigh. We're doing well, on that note. Luck be on our side. No kids, no exes, and a short commute between us--phew. Communication takes ongoing work and faith, as ye know.
Much luck and love to you all, Sillies, on Saint Patty's and every day!
Dear Sillies,
My young siblings and I garnered TikTok and Instagram fame. Yippee! Somehow a photo of us in the backseat of our Rebel station wagon, circa 1974, got grabbed for this fun video. You'll see us in the first group shot after the girl in the initial scene. You'll recognize me immediately, I'm certain. (I posted this picture years ago here, and it's on my Facebook sidebar.)
Were you lucky to have one of those rear facing back seats? It was my spot, and nobody argued. I'd have innocent fun there on long drives--holding up pictures of a cartoon man sweating, with the question "Are you hot?" I got a few chuckles. Those were the days. Am I right?
Be well, Sillies.
Hugs!
Dear Sillies,
I hope this finds you safe, comfortable, and well.
For your rainy day entertainment, or my rainy day entertainment if it's not rainy out your way, I've a few weird book covers to show you ~
Who can argue this? Right?Dearest Silliest of the best of Sillies,
'Twas another fabulous Anti-VDay fest!
Thank you to all who entered, but no thanks to HRH for disqualifying Debra She Who seeks before Debra even had a chance.
Our winner and new champion, who truly killed it, and will thus receive a very sweet mailing from our administrative team:
Entry #1:
With you dead,I'm alone in my bed.ready to enjoy Valentine's Day.At last.
CONGRATULATIONS, Elephant's Child! You deserve this and that empty bed. We all love you.
Have a sweet, bittersweet, OR sour day, my Sillies.
Whatever you do, don't buy Hershey today or any day. (See Joanne's entry in post below.)
Second place goes to our belovedly hilarious Birgit! See hers and the other wonderfully hateful entries too.
I love you, my darlings.
Entry #1:
Entry #2:
Your heart, a blender, and I'm ready for the day.
Entry #3:
Entry #4:
Somewhere my love, there will be songs to singAlthough not with you because you stink!Dumb ding-a-ling! Birgit
Entry #5:
It's February, my Sillies!
You know what that means, right? Yep, it's time to rev up your creative, hateful anti-Valentine's Day braincells. Life by Chocolate's Annual Valentine's Hatefest is on! You'll vote on the winner, and they'll receive a very generous sweet treat package.
Dear Sillies,
How are you, my friends? It seems as though the New Year's celebrations were looong ago, am I right? So much has gone on this month. All the more reason to be good to yourselves.
Now, I'm sharing a few entertaining reviews about a few books.
Disclaimer: I'm not on Team Jessica Simpson but I am on Team Harry and Meghan!
First, Jessica's Simpson's 27 page "book":
"The cover looks like something you will enjoy. Reminds me of dating a very well proportioned woman and you end up with an empty bra."
Dear Sillies,
How are you? Well, that's too big of a question, so I'll just say BE SAFE. Be warm. Be loved. We're faring okay despite CA's state of emergency. But the stormy weather won't let up any time soon. I'm keeping positive thoughts for us all.
And for today: I was fortunate enough to be in the audience over twenty years ago when Coretta Scott King, Martin Luther King's then widow, who passed away in 2006; gave a moving speech. Even more awesome, that speech was delivered to a Jewish audience. (George Santos wasn't there. Note: He's Jew-ish. He was born Catholic. Ask him. Smiles. Oy vey.) As I was saying, I couldn't have felt more directly connected with the Reverend's teachings.
As catastropic as things may seem, there's always reason for hope. Without hope, there's no courage.
TRADITION!