My Story, Yours Too.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Pizza Delivery, Part IV

This series, written several months in retrospect, loosely follows from this post. Hint: “pizza” represents something else. Part III is here. Enjoy this and/or good pizza.
It all seemed so unreal.

Delivery Boy called, as promised, the next day. Our connection evolved into a sweet and steamy summer romance. Between binges, there were frequent “I’m here for you” phone calls, strolls through the park hand-in-hand, and laughter about the absurd. I hadn’t giggled so much in years.

Wow. I ordered good pizza, and that’s exactly what I got – toppings placed in ways I’d never thought possible, prepared and delivered with more passion than I’d ever experienced. On the side, loving sensations marinated. It was a first since my divorce three years earlier.

One night after a frenzied take-out, I asked Delivery Boy about his route, expecting the typical reassurance he was apt to convey. “I’m the only one you deliver to, right? Do you see possible long-term arrangement for us?”

He answered decisively: yes, of course I was the only one. No, we had no future. Delivery Boy wouldn’t commit to an exclusive partnership with anyone, not now or later. If another woman placed an order, though, he’d do the honorable thing and tell me before filling it.

Note to self: I warned you! No string cheese, remember? What were you thinking?

Note in response to note to self: I wasn’t. I wanted the whole pizza pie. But so do you. Doesn’t everyone? Shut up and cut me some slack, or a thick hot slice of deep dish – no, no, never mind. I can’t eat it without string cheese. And that’s too fatty, and goes straight to the thighs, and leaves an all-consuming and confusing aftertaste. Damn string cheese!

Needless to say, Delivery Boy’s response was hard to swallow.

“I need to sleep on it,” I told him. We’d have a heart-to-heart the next day.

Stay tuned for the final delivery.


  1. Ouch! It just doesn't get easier does it?

  2. Well, he wouldn't be Delivery Boy any more if he gave you the string cheese you crave. You'd have to start calling him House Boy. At least he only delivers to one customer at a time.

  3. huh, damn string cheese!

    that "on the side, loving sensations marinated"...priceless!"

    now i'm hungry!


  4. Uh oh, I think this may be leading up to some heavy duty heartburn. You were smart to spice up your orders with Delivery Boy, but you may need to stick with lukewarm pizza in the future. Is there any chance we can turn this into a musical? Julie

  5. Afraid I would have lost my taste for pizza, right then and there.

  6. Damn, I had a feeling that this might turn bad, it's a shame that the guy isn't willing to commit, I reckon he'll end up regretting letting you go one day if that's how the story ends Robyn, this has been a great series and I really can't wait until the "final delivery" haha

  7. He'd dump you to deliver elsewhere? How rude.

  8. Delivery boy is one of those guys, well at least on the plus side he tells no lies.

  9. Yvonne, no, it gets harder - er, more difficult. Thanks.

    GB, true.

    Betty, thanks so much.

    EmptyNest, good point about the heartburtn. I'm not sure who'd star in the musical, but that could be interesting.

    MsA, the aftertaste is pretty yucky.

    YW, I appreciate it.

    Alex, you see clearly.

    Baygirl, thanks, yeah. Ouch.

    L Diane, some people don't like to deliver exclusively.

    Pat, it is good that he's honest.

    Thanks everyone,

  10. I'm stopping in for the chocolate blog hop.
    There is one more reason I don't like pizza. :)

  11. Ouchy. :( That's harsh. Well, at least he respects you enough to only deliver to one person at a time...

  12. I think I saw this movie...starred Richard Gere right...Gigolo or something?? Sorry, continue with your story.

  13. At least DB was kind enough to tell you before he started delivering to other houses on the route. I found out my DB had other deliveries via mutual friends. Talk about indigestion.

  14. Hard to swallow.. lol

    Well, at least you got what you ordered... and God knows, that's hard to come by these days.

    Hard to come by... oh boy..


  15. Thanks, everyone. You always make me smile.