My Story, Yours Too.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Woman on the Verge of Paradise: Cattiness

Sign reads "May you find Paradise to be all its name implies."

Thanks for joining me on the verge of Paradise, as the next chapter of my life unfolds. If you're new to Life by Chocolate, or just madly trying to catch up with your blog reading (Can we ever truly catch up?), this non-fictional autobiographical story begins here. While I strive for accuracy regarding place and time, I am altering a few names as I see fit. This does not include Nora Profit, Mimi or Mojo the cat. Those names are perfectly right and perfectly real.
                                                                          Mojo in his favorite spot (on my bed)
                                                     Mojo in his second favorite spot (in my kitchen cabinet)


A 20-year old college student was shot in the chest at CafĂ© Culture just two nights after my excursion there. He was standing right about where I parked my car. Last I read, the victim was - miraculously - expected to make a full recovery. Thank goodness!

But I sure feel petty for complaining about all the non-excitement around here.
Three mornings ago, at 4am, the boy rammed his head on the door with enough force to successfully enter my bedroom. You should know that the door was (1) closed and (2) locked. Clearly, I needed to give it an extra shove but failed to do so. He’s been fine since then, intact enough to rip up the bottom of my box-spring mattress, navigate my kitchen cabinets with sufficient prowess to snack on some veggie sticks, and bite me once or twice daily.

Damnit, Mojo! I mean, look sweetie, either you go or I go, and I ain’t going. Furthermore, if any boy’s going to be so anxious about entering my bedroom as to pummel through my locked door and madly tear up my bed, I prefer that boy be human. Got it? Run along now. Go find him for me. Make sure he’s nice and smart too. Okay?
“Zeek’s missing.” Her tone was somber as Nora entered The Loft on Wednesday morning. “He didn’t come home all night. He probably got hit by a car.”

Zeek’s a charming black-spotted white kitty, with a dark triangle that uniquely accentuates the left edge of his nose. “Sorry, I'll miss him too,” I shared. I like Zeek more than Mojo. He practices non-violent communication and doesn’t implore my attention at every turn.

I thought to call Mimi, who adores Zeek, but I lacked a free four-hour window. Short of pretending the phone line’s been snipped, it’s not possible to conduct a brief conversation with Mimi. She’s not working at The Loft anymore, since her computer skills are even worse than mine. There's little she can help with, now that I'm there.

Note that the only way for my computer competence to supercede another's is for that other to refuse to touch a computer, as is the case with Mimi. “I was too busy with my rock 'n roll band to learn computers,” she defends. “I can’t learn them now; it’s hard on my eyes. I need to sit 10-15 feet from the screen. The glare causes me headaches. I think it's an aging thing. And I need to squint and take breaks. I don’t know how to move around on the screen. You’re so good at it, Robyn.”

Mimi’s a dear, and we’ll remain friends. She is okay with not working these days, as she’s facing home foreclosure and other stresses familiar to many.

Thus, the two of us (Nora and I) pushed through that day without Zeek or Mimi, and I experienced my usual abundance of computer frustrations.

“Nora, does it typically take 5 minutes for an email to get sent? Oh, I shouldn’t have left these things open, huh? Um…Sorry to bother you again. How do I save this file? Oh, the ‘save’ function saves files. Thanks...Excuse me, just one more thing, would you please show me how to switch to your side of the computer to pull up the monthly calendar and re-format it to fit landscape 11 x 8.5 and add a link to it for the next class and then upload the calendar to the website and then send out an email to our folks to invite them to the event? Thank you.”

She left to run an errand (Who could blame her?) and came back announcing, “Look who I found!” Zeek was in her car all night long. My eyes welled. It was a happy ending to a sad day.

Next time I complain about non-excitement, feel free to tell me that I’m being catty.


  1. Whew...what an update!

    I'm glad Zeek is ok!!

    Wow, that is scary that someone was shot in almost the same spot where you were just a couple nights before. *shudder*

  2. I'm glad she found Zeek too! I think Mojo is a Diva ;0) The coffee shop story is really scary. I'm glad you weren't there that day XO

  3. I am very glad you weren't at the coffee shop when that happened.

    Well you always seem to find excitement where ever you go Robyn.

  4. I am glad the kitties remain safe for another day. Human though seem to be endangered species around your gateway to hell. How are you doing really? Are you lonely for home yet or have you totally committed to the new adventure? Know that I got your back girlfriend.

  5. Sooo glad that boy will be okay and more glad you were not there!

  6. I'm glad Zeke's okay.
    I don't understand why the email's slow because most everything but Magalia and Stirling City is downhill from Paradise.
    I understand, now, why you didn't know about the shooting at Cafe Culture when I mentioned it.
    Actually Chico has gotten fairly tame now that they don't celebrate Pioneer Days any more. ;-)

  7. Marlene, yeah, though the area is generally pretty safe. Still, it's freaky. Thanks. xo

    Marnie, yes, Mojo is Prince of the feline divas! Thanks for your concern. ;0)

    OT, thanks. Yeah, why does excitement always find me? It's that 10% thing, isn't it? xo

    Kal, you're sweet. Thanks. So far, so good. I think I must've been ready for this change, else the stress hasn't quite yet hit. <-;

    Yvonne, thank you. I didn't want to worry anyone. That's sweet. It could happen anywhere, not that I won't continue to be vigilant. I just feel badly for complaining about a humdrum eve there, given the chain of events. xo

    IT, I appreciate it. The 'ole computer has limited memory & the McAfree anti-virus program to further delay things. I'm sure you're right about safety in Chico. I'm probably safer here than I was in the Bay Area.=o)

  8. Oh, Dear Robyn what would Chico and Paradise be without you?...a dead boring face in a staring contest with itself....Smiles - that's what your mutterings bring to this stony face... Enjoy wrecking your comp and having mojo wreck your home. :)

  9. That cat is crazy about you, Robyn. He's either in love or your skin is made of catnip.

  10. That's going to extremes to EXPERIENCE CULTURE but I'm glad he's OK>

    For a sec- I didn't know what BOY crashed through your door!

    Glad Zeke's OK!
    Hmmmm. not much for excitement huh? Well: describe a DULL DAY! LOL

    That was awesome!



  11. Boys crashing into bedrooms, shoot outs at the local club, missing cats - you sure live an exciting life! Kat

  12. Robyn - I don't one bit that you are safer. It's just because it's a small media market, more folks are apt to find out about it.

  13. Sort of glad my boy's not going to Chico State now.... Keep us informed of all that is new and exciting in your new 'hood!

  14. As long as everyone is home safe at night and that includes all the pets then it is a good day. Some people and computers are best kept apart.

  15. Hey Robyn :) I think you should start a column in the local paper, wouldn't that be fun!
    I seriously laughed thru this whole post, ok, not the kid dying :( that's really sad!
    Hope you have a great day!ps, I have been working on your poem, not sure if I want to start over on the design or not! We'll see :)
    love ya
    gi gi

  16. Those mountain people can shoot too? And I thought you'd be all safe and happy there!

  17. Another nice tale of life in Paradise!

  18. Oh my goodness!!!! That was a heart-pounding update! I'm so glad everyone is all right, and I'm super glad you weren't at the cafe when that happened! *Hugs*

  19. Thanks Rek. I always enjoy your comments, and I'm glad to make you smile. You do the same for me. xo

    GB, nah, he's just mad for attention. When Steven's here, he's all over him. Then again, he doesn't pummel through his door at night. I must be made of catnip. Thanks. ;0)

    John, YOU are awesome. Thank you. LYMI. xo

    Kat, it's what I get for complaining about non-excitement. Thank you for being such a loyal follower of this series. [-;

    IT, that's a really good point. There is only one biggish paper around here, the Chico E&R (or N&R?), right? xo

    BB, I forget where he's going..? Davis? Saco St? Thanks for reading, and I'll keep you posted. =~)

    Gobetween, yes, we need to count our blessings and shouldn't take safety for granted. Thank you. xo

    Gigi, you are a sweetheart. Don't work too hard on that. I'm sure it looks great as is, too. Thank you, dear friend. [o:

    Sarah, safety and happiness are still possible. It's a lot safer here, generally, than in the Bay Area. xo

    Chuck, thanks. Glad you came by. =->

    Fristky, thanks hon. You're sweet. It happened at 2am, and I'm never out that late anymore. But I'll be careful. Hugs back to you. xo

  20. Glad you weren't in that spot later!!

    And I am always careful not to mention anything about life being dull. :-) There are far too many ways for it to become "exciting".


  21. Daaaaang, Mojo's in love with you. Breaking down doors, just to be with you. My cat just sits and cries outside my locked door until I let her in. She's a princess.

  22. Probably should take Cafe Culture off your list.

  23. I am here to catch up...I have been MIA for a week or two - Wish I hadn't been, I love these posts!!!

  24. You just gotta love those kitties!
    They all should be on one form of medication or another...

  25. That's crazy about the boy. I'm glad Zeke was found. :)