Monday Meshugenah

Meshugenah = Yiddish for craziness.

Part I.

This arrived in the mail last week. I'm not sure why California State Controller John Chiang sent me 46 cents, but I assume that's how much he appreciates my hard work on behalf of folks who need a lot of support to get through the day. Thanks, Johnny C.!


Then I wondered, can I deposit this? What will happen? Come with me to my bank, where there's no extra fee for using the ATM. Watch, I'll just place it in the check slot, and hmm, "Amount Not Detected." Understandable.

So I input the .46 manually, and it went through! WOOHOO! It's a wonderful thing to be working two careers jobs, helping people in need, having received degrees from two of the nation's most reputable universities, and savoring the blessing of medical coverage -- all the while receiving thousands of dollars in med bills, added to a debt that's growing by the minute. Alas, Mr. Chiang saves the day! Thanks, Mr. Chiang. I'd send you a thank-you note, but I can't afford the stamp.Please forward another check for .05 cents and your note will be forthcoming.

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Part II.  I recently posted about Kim and Kanye's spawn's name here. 

Update: They've since explained their reasoning for choosing the name "North West": "There's nothing further North than North" they say. "North represents our highest point as a couple," they add.

Do you think anyone will ever inform this moronic duo that North isn't up, because the world is round??

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Part III. Hospitals are designed to enhance the patients' comfort, in theory.

During my post-surgery hospital stay in May, I walked down the next wing. A big sign overhead read:
"DEFINITIVE EXIT CARE UNIT".  I didn't take a picture, because a pale, elderly, lifeless looking woman stood nearby. I didn't want to seal her fate; she appeared ready to embark on a definitive exit. There was also an Emergency Exit a few yards away.

I quickly turned back towards room 295A, my room on the post-surgery wing, very grateful I hadn't been placed in the Definitive Exit Care Unit, even though I heard the play-by-play regarding another patient's bowel movement progress. We were all very happy for him, except, perhaps, those in the DEFINITIVE EXIT CARE UNIT.

Happy Monday and new week. 
Laugh at all that's meshugenah. 
Keep a smile and a stash of chocolate!

Last Week's Baby Naming Discourse Between Kim and Kanye

Imagine the brilliant discussion between Kim and Kanye when deciding to name their baby "North West." They really did. I snuck into her hospital suite last week when they stopped a game of Spin the Bottle to discuss what to name their yet unborn girl. It went down like this:

Yo let's go wid Beyonce, best name of all time!

But like I want Kim Kay.

Check it out! It's a rhyme!

B*tch! That would make her initials be KKK 

She'd ruin my image 

Of a chill Black dude. No way!

So like let's flip a coin.

Do you call 'heads' or 'elbow'?

'Heads!' and I flipped it. 

Where'd that f*cker go?

Like I don't see it now. Guess we both lost the bet.

So then we should name her after the state where we met!

Cool. I like sh*t like that!

She'll be our little L.A.

But we met at a NY strip club

When I was on my vacay!

Then North West it is. F*ck ya, it's agreed!

I so seriously like it. 
She'll never get teased.