Rainbows, Butterflies, and She Who Seeks

My Dear Sillies,

There's so much love here in blogland, and in the universe. It's important to remember this - especially with the atrocities going on in the Middle East. 

Sometimes the best we can do is send out love (and/or prayers, blessings, earnest hope for real change). Though this feels dismally insufficient, it's the most humane option, and it's desperately needed. 

"Evil exists in the part. Perfection exists in the whole. I can choose this latter view, not that I always should, but I always can." -Hugh Prather

Having a balanced perspective is both healthy and necessary. That said, let's shift toward rainbows. I was gifted with a most beautiful glass rainbow piece by blogland's fantabulous Debra She Who Seeks.   How gorgeous is this? Answer: More gorgeous than it appears here. It's Debra's first attempt at glass work. I told her that I love it, so she went to the trouble and expense of shipping it to me from Canada. I'm a lucky gal!

Where there are rainbows, there are butterflies. This one posed for me for over 20 minutes a couple days ago. To my delight.

The butterfly is a sign of freedom, transformation, hope, and faith. 

May your days be filled with equally beautiful sights and acts of loving kindness. 

Love you, my Silliest of Sillies.

Life by Chocolate, Fiddler on The Roof

My Dear Lovey Sillies,

Sorry I've been so absent. 

As you can see, though, I'm a survivor!

And I had the pleasure of seeing a theatrical production of Fiddler on The Roof this weekend. Our local cast did a wonderful, heartfelt job. Have you seen the play or film? The music is unforgettable. 

TRADITION!

Third, what's up with the guys who find out you're single (by, for example, spying on your Facebook page) and try to befriend and/or re-friend and/or re-date you? Asking for myself. Cringe, right? 

Have a good week, as Fall begins. Yippee! 

Happy 5784 to the Jewish world!

I love you!

Heartache Tonight and Beyond

Dear Sillies,

I'd been quiet about JT because things were going so smoothly and giddily. Our chemsitry was comfortable and fun; our attraction, consistently strong. He'd cook for me several times a week. We trekked to the beach, to San Francisco Bay, and many local destinations. We also just stayed in and played Scrabble and other indoor games. Wink. All in all, I've felt more joyous love for JT than I've felt for any other man in my life. 

BUT (You knew this was comin') in the past month or so, he'd distanced himself and failed to communicate. My every attempt to talk only made things worse. 

BUT, BUT the lovey-dovey moments and messaging continued even through this Friday evening, for 2.25 YEARS. Despite this, it's gonna be another heartache tonight and tomorrow night and the next night and so on. 

When I dropped by his home yesterday, this discourse ensued:

"I was going to call you," his tone, stoic. "I'm going to stay in tonight." 

"Okay, alright." Disappointed but not surprised, I ask: "Anything else?"

"No. That's all."

"Well what if I have something to say?"

"Go ahead."

"I don't know how to talk to you anymore." A bucket of tears pours down my cheeks. "Do you even want to keep me in your life?"

"I DON'T KNOW." 

You don't f*ckin know?! "You have no idea how much you're hurting me."

My friends, I got no explanation, no kindness, no apology, none of the thoughtfulness that I love/d so much about JT. Not even a lousy t-shirt with the logo "He doesn't want this." Dude simply reiterated that he has nothing to say. He doesn't want "this."

I know I deserve better, my Dear Sillies.  

I love you, and I know you're here and there and wherever for me through this heartache. Please and thank you. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On a happier note: Happy 12th Anniversary to the IWSG! I'm into my 14th year of blogging and even more exciting, I'm slowly approaching 1 MILLION VIEWS. I can't wait to become a millionaire! We'll celebrate in sweet style. Please do stick around.