My Story, Yours Too.

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Date by Telegram? Nincompooptitude

Dear Sillies,
    What happened to the long lost art of...talk? Seriously, men my age (50 plus) -- you grew up with the coil wrapped around your fingers as you chatted on the phone -- did you not? Men of all ages: Congratulations! You can write "hey"! That's good for nothing. Hint: The "hey" that's for horses has an "a" not "e" in it.
   Yeah, I'm frustrated. I've had some fun* with male prospects in the past months. But when it comes to follow through, their girthy ineptitude shows.   *=kissy-kissy, no nookie-nookie.
                    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   We'll call this man Paul Revere. Paul and I had fun* at a Halloween party. Paul put my number in his smart phone. He even tossed out a possible New Year's date, so I'm pretty sure he was interested. He seemed to be a nice, nerdy type. 
   But there was no next-day phone-call.
   Two days later, this FB correspondence ensued:
  
   "I tried to text you. Bad signal. I don't think you got it."
   "Drats. No worries. It was fun to meet you. I hope to see you again soon."
   "Are you free this weekend?"
   "Not Friday. Saturday, yes."
   No message until Sunday from Paul.
   "Sorry to keep you hanging. I couldn't make it. Brunch now to talk about the logistics of a proper date?"
   "Right now? No, I can't, catching up on lots of things. Thanks."
   "How about Wed?" You want to marry me? You can't even talk to me! He sends me a blurb about a music event on Wednesday.
   "Well, I've other things planned that night, but maybe we can meet afterwards, since I'll be a few doors down from the show."
   "Sounds great. Here's my land line 28675309. Other phone is 18675309. Land line#" (again for emphasis).
   "Okay. You have my number."
   "If you can't reach me, Western Union telegraph works in a pinch."

   "Ha! I'll send smoke signals."
   After I wrote this, I realized that perhaps he wasn't trying for humor. I googled the telegram/telegraph. Guess what, my dears? It still exists!
  Furthermore, the shortest telegraphic exchange is attributed to Oscar Wilde. Living in Paris, he is supposed to have cabled his publisher in London to see how how his new book was doing. The telegram simply read “?” to which the reply cabled back was "!" 

I wrote to Revere again:
   "I thought you were kidding about Western Union. I'm not up for that. This is taking too much work. Best of luck to you."

   Sigh. One if by land, two if by sea, three if I shalt ne'er see you again, Mr. Revere. 
             ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Be well, safe, and good to you!
Love.

26 comments:

  1. Totally off topic, but I just visited Paul Revere's North Church and suffered a bit of disappointment myself.

    Perhaps that could be my blog post...

    As for your Mr. Revere. Toss his number. Men treat you the best in the beginning and if this is his best, I'd hate to see his worst. He's not worthy of my Robyn. Keep looking!

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    1. Thank you, sweetie. That means a lot.
      Paul Revere isn't all the hype.
      Hugs.

      Delete
  2. Wow? Really? That is sad. Where do you find these people? And I thought I had some doozies.

    Take a hard pass and tell him to stick his telegraph up his...

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    1. Haha. Thank you, Pat. I know, where and why do I always seem to find the doozies?

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  3. I sent a telegraph once. I think it was in the late 1970s. Weird.

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    1. Haha. You're a classy lady, so this makes sense. But that was approx 50 years ago, and you weren't doing it as a courting gesture. If you were, though, that was very romantic. Thanks, Debra.

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  4. Why would anyone telegraph now?
    What's wrong with people. Call. Don't email, don't text, don't send smoke signals - call then meet and talk in person.

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    1. That's what I'm saying, Alex! Thank you! Thank you! Just freakin talk on the phone, and then talk in person. Be human! Oy vey.

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  5. at least he didn't say a fax. Communication these days with anybody is weird and frustrating. You did make this humorous.
    Big sigh on your behalf.

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    1. I'll happily accept your sign, added to my own, Joanne.
      Thank you. Cheers.

      Delete
  6. Dear Robyn, I have read of Mr. Wilde's succinct telegraphic inquiry and equally brief (and encouraging) reply, but hadn't thought of it in a long time. Oscar Wilde saved the world from further indignities of Restoration "Comedy" and has my abiding gratitude. I got kicked out of Lennis Dunlap's (Chico State College)upper division class in the subject for that opinion in 1970. Wilde's "Importance of Being E(a)nest" lifted romantic comedy from the banality of Congreve, Wycherly, Otway and all who made a living dancing on Shakespeare's grave. Why do I still think of Dunlap? Because that "W" on my transcript meant more to me than an "A", even though it nearly got me drafted. My age group seldom admits it, but things are better now.

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    1. My goodness, there are stories within stories here, Geo. And my admiration for you has multiplied ten or one hundred fold. You were kicked out for an honest opinion? I'd have never completed schooling, had that been my case. But a few years did make a difference. Things are better now. In Mr. Wilde's Publisher's (Victor Hugo's? - Is that right?) telegraphic response: "!"

      Love you, dear, wise spitfire.

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  7. That does not sound too different from my experiences. The internet makes it too easy for people not to engage. These dating sites all seem to have people only halfheartedly interested in finding someone or perhaps it is that they don't see what they are looking for out there. I certainly do NOT see my woman that peek my interested and then when you add in the complications at our age it is very easy to give up.

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    1. Yes, yes. There are so many complications, so much discouragement. Dating ain't what it used to be. I'm unsure if dating even exists any more. People just want to "hang out" or "hook up" or...received an f*n telegram -- ?

      Thank you, Bathwater.

      Delete
  8. Sorry that ended in a disappointing way. Though I no longer have a land line, it occurs to me if and when you give your number to someone down the line perhaps only giving them the land line and say, here's my home phone, to call not text. No experience with dating in this day and age so am clueless on that. Been married since the dark ages. Truly, just turned 69 a few days ago. Good luck!

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    1. We're thinking alike. If/when I give my number again, I will make it clear that it's only for the purpose of talking. If he can't do that, he won't even get smoke signals from me. Then again, I've said as much. Doesn't work. Still get the "hey" or text messages from my in my generation. Weirdos.

      Thanks, Sandy.
      Smiles.

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    2. *from "men" in my generation, that is. ;-)

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  9. I don't even think I've heard the word telegraph since my youth. And that was a long time ago :)

    So sorry it ended so badly - or weirdly. You certainly deserve a lot better than this guy!!

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  10. Robyn, I'm sure you were attracted to Paul Reeves' pots and pans. He was also supposedly a pretty good beer maker. A little patience here, after a belly full of beer maybe there would have been another midnight ride ;)

    www.thepulpitandthepen.com

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    1. HAHA! I should've consulted you, not only during my car crisis, but my men crises. That's sage advice. Hilarious too. Thank you! =)

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  11. YIKES! I totally agree that it sounded like way too much work to connect, so good for you for stopping all that headache. I'm one of the old fossils who still has a landline(lol) because I feel more comfortable sitting on the phone and twisting that cord(lol), even though I have 2 cell phones. I remember having that little piece you needed to make sure the cord didn't get too tangled up too, along with the rotary dial, and the phone lock my mom used so she could occasionally get some calls from friends, because of course there was no call waiting.(lol) Great post and Happy Monday! Hugs, RO

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    1. It was fun twisting that cord around my fingers. I miss land lines.
      Hugs, RO.

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  12. Good grief! Such nonsense. I wouldn't think it would be so hard to pick up a phone and give you a call. I agree with the above. You deserve better than this wishy washy fellow.

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    1. Thanks, Connie. He's not trying to connect anymore - not as far as I can tell.

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