Submit an Anti-Valentine's Day entry based on the theme: Damn Be the Fairytale.
Post it in the comments section or forward to me at Rawknrobyn@aol.com.
My followers will vote on one, and the winner will receive a generously sweet package. Feel free to enter more than once.
I was initially disappointed at the false advertising. Where's the pink? It looks white inside, like the originals. (See the real ding dong in the bottom left.) But it does taste sweet, and satisfying to some extent. They're just okay. Having been eating a bit healthier these days, though, I detected that not-too-appetizing taste of factory made items that had likely been stored in a warehouse overseas before journeying to my local grocery store. Thus, Hostess' limited edition Chocolate Raspberry Cupcakes/Ding Dongs get a 3 on the Robyn (1-10) scale of chocolate goodness.
Be well, my Dears. Get those entries in!
Robyn, I'm struggling with coming up with an entry for your Anti-Valentines Day contest. I actually DO like Valentines Day, you see. So I may have to turn this assignment over to Her Royal Highness to see if she can come up with anything.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, Debra. Cats can be more creative with these things, though. I understand. They don't shop at Hallmark.
DeleteI don't trust any of the "new" Hostess products since the "real" Hostess went bankrupt a few years ago. Someone bought the name and supposedly their recipes, but... I dunno...
ReplyDeleteI'm not supposed to eat that stuff anyway, cuz I'm diabetic.
That's probably true about Hostess. I think I heard the same. I won't buy their products again. You're a better, healthier person for avoiding them too.
DeleteThanks, Silver Fox.
Debra She Who Seeks is so friggin' useless! I just have to shake my head sometimes. I had NO trouble whatsoever coming up with an entry for your Anti-Valentines Day contest. Here it is:
ReplyDeleteRoses are red,
Violets are blue,
Toms pretend to be Super Cat
But are really Pepe le Pew.
Now was that SO difficult? My human's problem is that she just doesn't deal with reality. Not like you and me, Robyn. WE know how the world of toms actually works.
Your Highness, I'm sorry your servant is as useful as a romantic human could be this time of year. I'd like to shake your paw for keeping it real about toms. Thank you, your Majesty.
DeleteWhat I said last time will do unless I think of something better.
ReplyDeleteI haven't eaten anything by Hostess in years. I think it all has a preservatives flavor. And I don't eat that stuff anyway.
Yes, what you said is perfect. And good for you to dodge this stuff. It's not worth it.
DeleteI had some funny bones and hostess cupcakes (regular) a few years ago and they tasted like chemicals. The cream was all clumpy, like lard instead of smooth like cool whip.
ReplyDeleteHa. Yuck. Yeah, they really downgraded. Shame on me for wasting my money. I learned my lesson.
DeleteHave not had any Hostess lately. Thanks for being our test monkey(!) and sacrificing those taste buds for the greater good. and I'm working up an entry, but I kinda like Valentine's (sorry, Ray is a winner...can't hate or damn him...hmmm)
ReplyDeleteNo need to hate or damn him, Joanne. You're a winning team.
DeleteAnd I'm always happy to be a test monkey, though no more Hostess for me.
Cheers.
Yep, hostess sure has the nastiness within as it sits in a warehouse from afar, blah. Never have and never will eat.
ReplyDeleteGood for you to never eat
DeleteHostess doesn't make a treat.
I bet you're going to get some funny entries!
ReplyDeleteYeah, what's up with the false advertising? The inside cream totally needs to be pink. I'd take out all the cream, mix it with food coloring, and reinsert. :)
Great entries already.
DeleteYes, more cancerous causing dye is needed.
Thank you, Sherry.
I haven't eaten any Hostess products for years. When I do indulge, I tend to go for fresh-baked goods instead. Sounds like I should stick with that plan.
ReplyDeleteSuch as it is, here's my entry for your contest, Robyn:
No longer will I sit and pine.
You won't hear me cry or whine
for a paper heart with a sappy line.
I don't need a Valentine!
All offers from you
I will decline,
because I don't need you
to say, "Will you be mine?"
I don't need a man to be defined.
I don't need the two of us to be combined.
I am complete by design.
Get lost now. Go away, you swine.
Instead, I'll treat MYSELF! I'll dine!
I'll pour MYSELF a glass of wine.
Don't worry about me.
My life's just fine.
Being single is quite divine!
I'll be my own love--I'll be MINE!
I'll be my own Valentine!
Bravo! Thank you, Connie.
DeleteSuperb.
My take on Valentine's Day is covered on current blogpost --trainideoftheenigmas.blogspot.com -- but here's an excerpt: "I am more inclined toward the Roman frolic it replaced, Lupercalia, which took place from February 13 through 15 and included the 14th --our modern Valentine's Day-- as a sort of recess reserved for apologizing to relatives and livestock and trying to stand up."
ReplyDeleteAs for Hostess Bakery products, at my age I eat them mostly for the preservatives.
Awesome. I shall visit. Thank you, Geo.
DeleteAnd preservatives -ha! Witty man.
I could really go for a Ding Dong now. I don't care about the color of the filling, as long as the chocolate frosting hasn't changed. But I do agree that it's false advertising. I really like Connie's poem so far.
ReplyDeleteJulie
No don't do it, Empty Nest. The chocolate frosting now tastes like plastic or worse. Yuck.
DeleteYeah, Connie's a wonderful poet.
Thank you for commenting.
Let Sail The Fairytale.
ReplyDeleteLove be a sweet song
Often misinterpreted
For love of the Ding Dong.
Many cum
Few get to stay
Still we like to gamble
At risk of The Betray.
It's mostly a charade
To sell flowers and shit
Even the buyers
Just wanna get jiggy wit it.
It's a pathetic game
To percolate shame.
Feel the stigma attached
To being left on the shelf
I one 'upped' them fuckers
And made love to my own self.
AL
Damn, this is good, Anthony! It's going to be a tight contest. Very hard choice to make. No pun intended. Ha. I especially like the ending. I one up them on the regular.
DeleteThank you!
Haha thanks Robyn. I dont mind who it goes to. I just wanted to add my bit and have some fun. :) xo
DeleteLOL. Reading the comments and looking forward to read the winner. Gosh, this is already making me chuckle.
ReplyDeleteIt's great fun. Isn't it? It always makes this holiday easier to get through, a joy, even.
DeleteI have to give some thought to my current anti-Valentine's Day sentiments.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
My nails are painted a bloody red.
DeleteSend me chocolate on the worst fucking day of the year,
or you'll wish you were dead.
Love,
Little Red Riding Snood
I'm on it. I might even have your address somewhere.
DeleteThank you, Janie and Little Red Riding Snood. I especially appreciate your use of the "f" word year after year. I f*ckn love you.
Well, I did manage to come up with something...
ReplyDeleteToo many gals or fellas
Have dreamed of Cinderella,
Or maybe it's Snow White
That's gotten them uptight.
But "Happ'ly ever after"
To me, just leads to laughter.
I'll shout it from my pulpit
That "love always" is bullshit.
There's far too many "good sports"
Who wound up in divorce courts.
Forego your geniality!
You need to face reality!
Ha! EXCELLENT! Wow -it's gonna be a hard choice.
DeleteThank you for this most worthy entry, Silver Fox.