Fun with Canadian Border Security, Some March Madness

Hi Dear Sillies,

Happy March! 

Life in the bigger picture is too much, so we need to have a bit of fun when possible.

I'd sent the lovely, hilarious Birgit her winning package, but it's been chillax-ing at the Canada-US border, likely mere miles from Birgit's reach. See, I'd received a call from Customs, stating that I must hire a broker (say what?) to have the goods released. Irritated and perplexed - you know me - I made this known.

Amid my fury I thought to ask: "Is this because of our new government?" The very polite, clearly Canadian Border Security officer replied: "good question, and others have asked this too." Aha. This feisty gal changed her tone, apologized for being contentious and for all the other bleep going on because of our bleepin bleep and bleepidy bleep bleep. I was careful to neither curse nor say "bleep," though.

Still, Birgit's winning package remains at the border. There are more steps. I was instructed to complete a form to allow the FedEx Trade Network to release said package. Done. I then needed to submit a statement with tracking number, total cost, and an explanation of said package. Done. They certainly didn't need this fleshed out explanation, yet I'm honest. They've been polite. Here's what I stated, after providing the basic information:

More specifically: Recipient, Birgit B. in Ontario, is the winner of a contest that I facilitated at my blog, Life by Chocolate see Rawknrobyn@blogspot.com. Due to my venom towards the US's commercial Valentine's Day-Hallmark-Hershey industry, and my typical status as an empowered yet sexually frustrated single woman, I facilitate an annual Valentine's Day Hatefest contest. The winner gets a sweet package. This year's winning entry was: "Roses are pink. Who cares? You're a soul sucking fink." She received the most votes for this, at 2 versus 1 for the other entries. 

  Thank you and warm regards,

  Robyn Alana Engel

Birgit, I hope they like your rhyme as much as I do!

I also hope this explanation will suffice. Fingers crossed.