I'm kicking-off Superbowl Sunday with announcement of:
Life by Chocolate's Annual Anti-Valentine's Day GIVEAWAY!!
There's a natural connection to football...fields of sweaty, studly young men and tight-end receivers working up a sweat, making passes, charging forward and scoring -- in SOMEBODY ELSE'S end-zone. Play after play. Game after game. Year after year. So, yeah, see rules below.
You, dear readers, will vote on the winner(s). I shall cast deciding vote(s), if needed. And you can vote for yourself, but it's one person, one vote. Kinda like real democracy, only I always accept bribes and compliments. Not that this has anything to do with who's gonna win. I just like bribes and compliments.
Oh, the winner(s)* will receive a very generous, sweet chocolate package in the mail -- their preferences and dietary restrictions taken into account.
*It's been too close to call for a few years, so more than one of you might win.
Have fun and send me your hate!
A good week to you, my friends.
Take care of yourselves.
Time to rev up the snark! I will be back...
ReplyDeleteAwesome. See you soon, Alex.
DeleteThis is the best my brain can do I'm afraid:
DeleteI love you just enough to spend ten bucks at WalMart on February 13.
Haha. That's pretty darn good, Alex. Thank you.
DeleteBribes are always nice. The cat can be bought, may not come cheap though lol
ReplyDeleteRoses are red.
Chocolate is brown
Tomorrow they'll be cheaper,
so calm the *uc* down
Excellent, and exactly 15 words.
DeleteThank you, Pat.
I look forward to voting for a winner. Take care.
ReplyDeleteYou too, Stephen. Thanks.
DeleteHappy Fucking Valentines Day..thanks for reminding me.....too rude?? I. In a good place but my friend is about to embark on a very nasty divorce so I was channelling her.
ReplyDeleteYeah, Happy Fucking Valentine's Day. The Falcons lost. Damnit!
DeleteI look forward to seeing them!
ReplyDeleteMe too, JoJo. Thanks.
DeleteI won't enter this year because I won last year. Someone else should have a turn at all that lovely chocolate.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
You're too generous, Janie.
DeleteLove you.
Aww this is going to be difficult because I LIKE Valentine's Day a lot.
ReplyDelete"A hundred hearts wouldn't be enough to carry the spite I have for you." I guess that's more of a slogan directed at one person.
"Love is an art, one letter off from fart. Let them both pass."
Yeah, that'll do.
Haha! That will do, PVP. Thank you for your submissions!!
DeleteI thought about you last night with the superbowl commercial featuring one of your leading ladies/jail birds, Martha Stewart
ReplyDeleteI know, Sage. I was laughing hysterically when I saw the commercial. Apparently, they're buds. My friends and I were laughing that one of those two has a history of imprisonment.
DeleteRoses are red
ReplyDeleteFeces are brown
Tie weights to yourself
Jump in and drown
I'll send you a bribe soon. I promise you. It will be great. I am the best briber. No one love bribes more than me.
I like yours.
DeleteOh my, I can't stop laughing. Excellently spiteful, Jono.
DeleteThank you.
1. How do I love thee? Not much!!
ReplyDelete2. Your lips are like a dead, dead rose.
3. Get lost or I'll get a restraining order!!
(Bribe to follow.)
A triple entry - fabulous.
DeleteThank you, Fishducky, and I'm looking forward to the bribe.
Pickleope Von Pickleope's suggestion above made me laugh. :)
ReplyDeleteThat PVP always makes me laugh, Connie.
DeleteMy entry is a picture at this link: http://shoshanah.space/2017/02/06/an-anti-valentine-card/
ReplyDeleteSorry! I don't know how to post pictures directly.
I LOVE IT, Shoshanah! Thank you!
DeleteI'll post it with all the entries when the polls close. =)
That's divine, Ms. M!
DeleteHearts are cheap
ReplyDeleteGrabbers fist and bump
Fake news by a creep
Tweeter named Trump
P.S - Where's Al when you need him?
Another fun contest,Robyn!
Julie
You're wonderful, Julie. Thanks for the entry.
DeleteI'll give Al a nudge, so I can submit his usual 15 entries. It's not the same without him.
I'll be waiting for the creative minds to send their entries and laugh my head off again. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's already looking really good and entertaining, Lux. I think a good number of us will be laughing our heads off. Thank you.
DeleteHmmm Right now i got nothing but i'll try to add something. I'm at work right now so not very motivated.
ReplyDeleteNo worries. You have until Saturday, Holli. =)
DeleteIntriguing contest. I'll go historical --preValentine Februaries:
ReplyDeleteThe shepherd in me
Misses Lupercalia --naked
Magistrates, shaggy
Thongs, whipped shins,
Plutarch and Rome.
That is HOT, and exactly 15 words.
DeleteYou nail it every time. No pun intended by the term "nail," because it's a verb and not a noun. Smiles.
Thanks, Geo.
(exactly 15 words)
ReplyDeleteValentine's Day: the only time it's socially acceptable to offer up genitalia as a present.
Exactly perfect too. ;-)
DeleteThanks, BnB.
Valentine's Day: When love is shown through trinkets and crap rather than emotions and intimacy.
ReplyDeleteAnother perfect 15 word entry.
DeleteThanks, sweet friend.
Hi Robyn! Yay....you know how I love contests. My entries will be coming by email as I don't know how to attach images to your comment section.
ReplyDeleteThank you, hon!
DeleteLadies and Gentlemen, we are about to experience some mild turbulen... ahhhhhhh. Love sucks. Amen.
ReplyDeleteLol. I especially like the "Amen." Thanks, Anthony. xo
DeleteRoses are neat
ReplyDeleteViolets are dear
Chocolates are sweet
I'd rather have beer
I'll take the sweets
DeleteYou take the beer
Who's the drunken fool?
It's clear.
Today's the day
ReplyDeleteyou might get a moaner.
Viagra's a way
for a four hour boner.
Viagra is nice
Deleteit's magical too
But who needs the blue pill
when cucumbers will do?
(My response is disqualified, because it's more than 15 words.)
"Don't buy me a thing,"
ReplyDeleteshe tells the poor sap.
Pal, get her some bling
because...IT'S A TRAP!
Yeah, dude, if you wanna get laid
DeleteJeweler must get paid.
It's Valentines Day
ReplyDeleteThere's chocolates, maybe flowers
Hey what's on TV?
Keep the TV on.
DeleteRelax. De-compress.
She needs something to watch
when you're having sex.
Love is in the air
ReplyDeleteBill Clinton may get lucky
He needs no excuse
It seems HRC
Deletemakes no demands.
Yet compared to DT,
She has YUGE hands.