Teach Erotica, School Daze

Dear Sillies,

   I feel for the college students who have to stare at computer screens and pay thousands of dollars for this (Chico State keeps RAISING tuition, whilst detracting from the college experience in too many ways) -- WHOOSH. Thank goodness we're not a parent, a student, or a teacher, right? Or are you? If so, have some chocolate. Then have some more. Repeat.

   But hey, school's back in session. This is good. This is fun. Naughty, even. Enjoy. 

PS Sorry about Martha (for her dad bod, that is. Someone's been going heavy on beer.) 

 

23andMe, Cougar Dating, The Sex Wait

 Dear Sillies,
   Remember when 23andMe was all the rage? My sister asked if I'd tried 23andMe, but I'd not yet heard of it. Thus my mind went to inappropriate terrain. Naturally. 

   I got excited and sweaty...Twenty-three AND ME? Yeah, I like the young guys. At last, a dating site for cougars. Sign me up!

   But for $199? Nah. I can work the scene on my own. Chico's a college town after-all. 

   Well, in a roundabout way, I scored a 23andMe package, and I didn't have to learn that I'm related to Vladimir Putin or anything troubling like that. It still boggles my mind that people get so excited about learning their ancestry and percentage of "Whiteness." Anyway...

   JT's clean and sober. I don't drink alcohol either. We shared sparkling water on the first night we talked. 

   He's 56, and yeah, my fantasy man is closer to 23. But compared to the geezers who are impotent or ever-complaining about their achy muscles, the ones who told me it hurts their rib cage or "You've pressing on my balls" when cuddling, well, JT's just the right amount of alpha male for my taste.

   See: 

   "We'll take it slow," he'd said when we started to date. "I don't want to rush into a sexual relationship again."

   "No, it's fine, I understand." No guy ever told me they wanted to wait. Is he for real? But then, I worried..."Um, how long do you want to wait?" I've done too much celibacy.

   "I don't know, maybe two weeks, or a month or something." 

   Phew. I didn't push back or bring it up (no pun intended). (Or pun intended?)

   Two days after that first night, I called JT. 

   "Great to hear from you," he said. "I'm heading for dinner to celebrate my sobriety birthday. It's 23 years today."

   "Wow, that's awesome. Congratulations." Wait, 23? 23? 23! 23 and Me! I like it. 

   

   A few more dates and JT confessed to "thinking impure thoughts" about me, when alone at night.

   A week or so later, he decided that "We don't have to wait any more."

   I agreed.  JT's every move and gesture was and seems intentional, thoughtful, and loving. It was a wonderful night. He's a darn good, solid man. 

   I got my 23andMe, and I like it. 

   Still holding my breath, smiling too.

Comment Collage Starring YOU

Dear Sillies,

Your warm-loving playfulness gives me plenty of reason to love you. Your comments give me plenty of material for entertainment too.  Here are your recent comments, my Dears, weirdly ordered. 

No blasphemy intended. Just good, naughty fun. 

Alex J. Cavanaugh Drunk Jesus. Not an image one wants in one's head.

Janie Junebug said I want details and pictures.

Geo. said I happen to know Jesus and He drinks wine, never beer. Check his hands for stigmata.

Yvonne said Stop looking for red flags. If there are any, you will see them.

Geo. Yikes!--in my 70s it's my Mantra, not a judgement.

Mary Kirkland said I don't give two birds about what celebrities do. They live in another dimension it seems most of the time.

presstfortime said Ahh, finally some real important news! 

Annalisa Crawford Oooh yes! A happy middle bit (I won't be presumptuous enough to call happy ending...) Joanne said And yes....She's hot. She just sizzles.

Moving with Mitchell I LIKE this story! Debra She Who Seeks Dropping Jesus off in a dark alley, LOL!  Martha said Ooooh, sounds lovely!

Moving with Mitchell said Well, Jesus loves you.

Birgit said I am already bored with all that love.

Debra She Who Seeks said Yeah, *yawn* Ben Affleck -- what the hell is up with that? Mike said "everything. As far as I can tell."