My Story, Yours Too.

Tuesday, March 10, 2020

Celebrity Book Fails

Dear Sillies,
   Money seems to buy everything. But wait! It doesn't buy smarts. Nor does it appear to buy book reviews, an editor, or a decent ghostwriter. 
   Be proud of your smarts and creativity.
   You are one of a rare kind, and I love you for it.
   
   Oh, here are two books by big-name celebs, as proof of the aforementioned assertions.
   Be good to yourselves, and don't read these:
 Rebels, City of Indra : The Story of Lex and Livia 1451694555 Book Cover

Rebels, City of Indra : The Story of Lex and Livia

Kendall and Kylie Jenner, stars on the hit reality show Keeping Up with the Kardashians , present their debut novel a  punctuation needed between "novel" and "a" thrilling dystopian story about two super-powered girls who embark on a journey together. In a world of the far future, the great City of Indra has two faces: a beautiful paradise floating high in the sky, and a nightmare world of poverty carved beneath the surface of the Earth. Whoa, really? You're like so creative! It's both the high sky and beneath the earth's crust? So like, it's totally not earthly! Nobody's ever done a story like this!! Lex grew up in an orphanage deep in the dark. That one in an alley in Jersey Shore! Yeah, that one's super suspect. Great setting to use. But even as a child, she instinctively rebelled against her fate the time when she would be judged either useful to Society or forced to live among the mutations in Rock Bottom, the lowest level. Hm, that sentence needs...lemme think...punctuation and meaning and omission of capital letters and deletion into the floating high skies then replacement by the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, revived and all grown up....For that is when Lex s and Livia s You perhaps should've hired an editor or a ghostwriter who writes destinies collide . Approached by an old enemy to help save Kane from mortal danger, Lex sacrifices her Special Ops career...Brought together by danger, they set out to find Kane, but what they discover is even stranger than either dreams." An end quote indicates that there's a start quote, sweeties.
Release Date:November 2016 Aren't you cute? You writted your first book-see together and it was published 4 years ago. Yet you didn't get a single review!
Publisher:Simon & Schuster, Incorporated 


I purchased this book after seeing Ms. Anderson's interview about it on NBC's Today Show. I have had a bit of a fascination with Pamela since she first hit the celeb circuit because though she is pretty, she has a certain "something" other than her looks that is hard to ignore. Sort of like a train wreck.

24 comments:

  1. No reviews? Maybe the publisher wanted it to die.
    I saw one video of Pamela and Tommy on a boat and it was way more than I wanted to see or know about either one of them.

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    1. Simon and Schuster too, Alex. How many of us and/or our colleagues got rejected from them and/or didn't even try with them because they are Simon and Schuster. Sigh. It's just wrong.
      Ha. Thanks for chiming in, and I'm sorry you saw that video.

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  2. I sure hope Pamela was ok after that big pink STAR fell on her thorax (consult book cover photo). At least it didn't land edgewise.

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    1. You're very thoughtful to express such concern about Pamela's...book cover. Thanks for the guffaw you just gave me, Geo. Well played. =)

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  3. I think that is the most covered up I have seen Pammy.
    Sigh at the first. I hope it has found its way to Rock Bottom, carved a little hidey hole for itself and hunkers down there for eternity.

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    1. It likely found a very cute, glitzy, pinkish space "carved beneath the surface of the Earth." Oy vey and puke, right?

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    1. You think they could afford at least 2, right? It's crazy.

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  5. Wow, that is pretty bad with no reviews after that long. Just reading that bit made my head hurt.

    Nice of Pam to cover up on the cover at least in case anyone is around that hasn't seen her already.

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    1. Good point about anyone who hasn't seen her without the star, Pat Hatt.

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  6. these books hurt my eyes, the thought of reading them hurt my brain.

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  7. First...hahaaaa..they wrote books and were actually published? Those 2 girls must have watched the Star Trek episode, “The Cloud Miners.” Oh wait, they could not watch anything that is past 5 minutes. Pam made sure that Star was placed there to hide all the surgical scars.

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    1. Well, anyone can publish nowadays, Birgit. But most people, especially these particular people, should not.
      You're right. Every point of that star is strategically placed. Good point.
      Thanks for adding to our silly discourse.

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  8. I was hoping for some juicy excerpts from Pam's book! She was very hot back in her early Playboy days.

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    1. And when she ran across the beach, her bosoms bouncing up and down as her glistening thighs pressed forwards and backwards. I mean, I don't know what you're talking about Bathwater. (She was hot!)

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  9. That first one's proof the just because someone is a celebrity, it doesn't mean they can write or sell books. And yet they had an agent get that deal for them. Sigh.

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    1. With Simon and Schuster too. That's the worst of it. Do they even still exist? I hope this put them out of business.
      Cheers, Diane.

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  10. A great post, cutie. Consider me warned.

    Love,
    Janie

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  11. I will steer clear of these books, not that either were in any of my tbr piles! Good reviews.

    www.thepulpitandthepen.com

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    1. I'm glad to know it, Sage.
      Stay safe and healthy, friend.

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  12. I think reading these books would give me a headache. Thanks for waving us off.

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