And I Wrote This Book.

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Martha Stewart's Yearlong Yuletide Cheer: A-Z Challenge

Martha Stewart stumbles in, gripping a 3 foot tall glass of something we can only assume is non-virgin. High-oh! I'm Mar, Mar, Marsha! Marsha! Marsha! F*k Jan! I'm Marsha Stew, Stupor, and I like to get sloshed sometimes and th, then all the other times too. Times two. Get it? Yeppers, I gotta big, real big and long glass for ya. It's yer, year-shlong. I mean, it's y, yer Yearlong Yuletide Cheer. Put what you wantinit. I like to mix it up with Jack Black Daniel Boon Arnold P, P, Pomegranate 'cuz he da man of my dr, drinks. Waiter, gets me a taxi driver. A young hot dark one, fast! Martha collapses and no one cares to help. 


30 comments:

  1. I have trouble believing even a drunk Ma-Stew would use, "Yeppers."

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  2. Stewie is stewed like prunes, and not a whit more appealing. Good one Robyn!

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  3. so many ma, ma, ma Martha's I would think it would last year round...

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  4. I would have thought Drunk Martha would be more depressed - "I used to be young and important! (hic!)"

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  5. What in the Sam freakin Hill is in that glass? o.O

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  6. Marsha Stew - that sounds really unappetizing.

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  7. Well at least passed out on the floor she can be a throw rug

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  8. She's scary when she's not drunk, I don't even want to go anywhere near here when she IS drunk. It makes me shudder.

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  9. Yesh.........you hit the Y. Cheers

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  10. This is going to be one of those A-Z blogs I'll never get out of my head. Maybe next year....omg, what am I saying?

    This is "Y" you are RawknRobyn!!! (smile).

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Dixie. Do you think Marsha Stupor will want to come back next year? She's still passed out.

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  11. "Hello everyone, my name is Martha, and I'm an alcoholic. Later in the show I'll demonstrate how to get vomit stains off of clothing with a cup of Dom Perignon."

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    Replies
    1. I like it, Stephen. Would've been good, had she not passed out in a drunken Stewart stupor.

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  12. Poor Martha. Just does not know when to say when.

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  13. Her hair's got more body in the pic. which I guess is better than her body's got more hair... eh? :)

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  14. I avoid all things Martha, anyone can do stuff with a staff, plus how does she get off telling everyone how to make a happy home, when she doesn't have a happy home? Can't figure out why anyone likes her.

    Sandy at Bridge and Beyond

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    Replies
    1. It's truly mind boggling. You're right, Sandy. Who the heck is she to make a happy home? Or happy anything or anyone?

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  15. I think she meant Marsha Stewtart

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  16. Was the pickled demon in the glass before or after she drank out of it?

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  17. Poor Jan Brady. Did she get her braces off yet?

    Julie

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    Replies
    1. No, she hasn't, Julie. She's still ugly! Ugly! Ugly! But she has a nice personality. Nah, that's not true either. Poor Jan Brady.

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  18. I think most men would need a few if they had to get biblical with Martha

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  19. I should get some type of compensation just for having the same name as this woman, no? Says, Good Martha :)

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