Yesterday's News; Martha, Martha, Martha, A-Z Challenge

We've trumped the Trump with Yesterday's News and a Yucca Tree. It's the Yuckyesterdoo. Imagine a day when this orange mofo is Yesterday's News. What a glorious thought! In times like these, we need to hold tight to such glorious thoughts until they're realized.

Martha Stewart stumbles in, gripping a 3 foot tall glass of something non-virgin.

"High-oh! I'm Mar, Mar, Marsha! Marsha! Marsha! F*k Jan! I'm Marsha Stew, Stupor, and I like to get sloshed sometimes and th, then all the other times too. Times two. Get it? Yeppers, I gotta big, real big and long glass for ya. It's yer, year-shlong. I mean, it's y, yer Yearlong Yuletide Cheer. Put what you wantinit. I like to mix it up with Jack Black Daniel Boon Arnold P, P, Pomegranate 'cuz he da man of my dr, drinks. Waiter, gets me a taxi driver. A young hot dark one, fast! Martha collapses and no one cares to help."

 

"That's a yuge drink," Trump says. "We're gonna make the Muslims in Mexico pay. I'm smart. I'm really smart. All the women on my show wanted me. I understand. I'm handsome. I like women, oh yeah, I like women. The brown people are druggies and rapists. Some are good. They're my servants. Build a wall. I sued the NFL and won a dollar from it. They'll pay for it. I've been bankrupted four times but that was in the past. Sure, I cheated on all my wives. Can you blame me? Everyone wants me! You should see my tower! It's really tall! I got no problems with that. Yeah, you'll see. I like women."