And I Wrote This Book.

Thursday, April 14, 2016

The Lowlylohandoublechindoo, A-Z Challenge

Crap! We hardly recognized her when she stomped into the studio. She's grown a chin or two, and the bright sun glasses block from view her bloodshot eyes.

Lindsay said she's "f*n sick and tired of that f*n Katy Pair-of-Jugs b*tch getting so much air time."

Katy looked at her and shouted, "Roar!" then ran away.

Lohan believes she once again found a place in this world (as a substitute for Trump's hair).

We think Trump likes this Lowlylohandoublechindoo better than the Katydoo. Perhaps that's because Trump and Lohan have the same values: none.
As if the fashion blasphemy of today's post wasn't enough, Lord save us all! Martha is back again  - trying to seduce Trump and sell some Lopez sh*t. Sorry folks.
"Hello, I'm Martha Stewart. A woman has needs, so I thought I'd try the Lopez look. I designed her dress, wore it, and then hung out (in more ways than one) with Meryl Streep to complain about how unfairly paid women are. It was a splendid time. Now, I'm going in search of a good *bleep.* Oh, I partnered with Walmart to promote the Lopez Lookalike Line. You can buy one of these dresses for $1 million.Ta ta! Or should I say 'Ta tas!'?" Martha attempts a smile, we think.

The cast and crew of Life by Chocolate deeply regrets this Ludicrous & Lowly post. We would like to promise that it won't happen again, but some things are out of our control. Please forgive us.

24 comments:

  1. I am so very grateful that you were able to avoid a number of perfectly good (in other contexts) L words.
    Lust and lick spring to mind.

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  2. That hairdoo actually makes it worse. Didn't think that was possible.

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  3. Lindsay's looking a bit harsh these days....

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  4. OMG..what has happened to Lindsay? She used to be so cute before she lost her mind, her sobriety and (maybe) her panties. I am thinking this might be the one example of the perfect spot for her...being on Trumps noggin' probably isn't the worst place that Lindsay has been.

    As for poor ex-con Martha...She doesn't seem to be the domestic goddess she once was prior to prison. I am thinking she needs to reinvent herself by releasing a new line of jumpsuits in colors other than orange.

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  5. Loving the Martha Lopez look!! I cant say anything about the double chins on Lohan because I'm sporting a couple myself these days.

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  6. Well, if Lindsay Lohan now has a little double chin, it's proof she's off the drugs because what do you think keep all those Beautiful People thin?

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    1. Good point, Deb. She must've moved on to chugging pitchers of beer.

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  7. Move over Herbie, Lohan's got a new love bug

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  8. lol at Pat. I forgot she was in the Herbie movie. :)

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  9. You continue to defame the rich and infamous

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  10. This whole post frightens me. :)

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  11. Yikes, lay off the doughnuts, Lindsay.

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  12. If Lindsay is stuck on Donald's head these days, does that mean there might be 1/2 a brain flopping around on his pudgy body now?

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  13. How can you make fun of Luscious Loose Lindsay?

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  14. Your inventiveness with these posts is remarkable.

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  15. The Lindsay Lohan story just makes me sad. The price of celebrity is really high. If she knew what it would've cost, would she still make those choices???? Of course, some of my own choices have been pretty costly, so people who live in glass houses...

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  16. Ahhh, the lives of the Rich and Infamous. Today, I interviewed Republican Mighty Mouth and Democrat Midas Mouth. Alicsgrandadventures.blogspot.com

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  17. Every post is a surprise! I never know what I'll find here. I remember when Lindsay Lohan was a sweet kid way back. She really derailed...

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  18. To think Lohan is 65 years old! She looks great! Wait...she's only in her 20's??? She looks worse than his hair!

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  19. Lindsay's new career! What a crazy idea! Ingenious!
    Where there's life there's hope.

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