Sunday, June 20, 2010

Crappy Anniversaries and What Hurts the Most



Dear Friends,


I cannot tell a lie. I'm sad.

It's a crappy anniversary
time of year. Thus, my posts will not
likely be full of my usual pep, for a week or so.

Please bear with me. I'll be back to my spunky self, making you laugh soon enough! I promise! xo

To follow is a splicing of Rascal Flatt's song, What Hurts the Most, and bits of my wedding ceremony. [This time of year, I would've been married for 3 years. Instead, I've been divorced for nearly 2.]

Blessed be this groom and this bride.
As this ceremony celebrates the covenant that is sealed with abiding love, so does this day promise the sweetness of that family union that is founded on dedication and commitment, on duty and self consecration.
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house

That don't bother me

I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out

I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while

Even though going on with you gone still upsets me

There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok

But that's not what gets me



With this ring, be consecrated to me as my husband with abiding love.
With this ring, be consecrated to me as my wife with abiding love.
What hurts the most
Was being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

And never knowing

What could have been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was tryin' to do

You have now spoken the words and performed the rites which unite your lives. I do, therefore in conformity with ancient custom and with the laws of this state, declare you husband and wife.

It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go

But I'm doin' it

It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone

Still Harder

Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret

But I know if I could do it over

I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart

That I left unspoken

May your days be good and long upon the earth, and may love and truth be your companions forever.

What hurts the most

Is being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

And never knowing

What could have been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was trying to do

May your journey bring you peace.

Not seeing that loving you

That's what I was trying to do

29 comments:

  1. Robyn,

    Wow! That's really something. You have a way with putting these things together that's very impressive. I'm sorry it isn't in honor of a more cheerful memory.

    One thing I'm confident of, given what I've seen so far, you're bound to create many happy memories of your own in the future.

    Best,
    John

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  2. Try to cheer up. (I know, easier said, than done) You never know when something wonderful is right around the corner and those old feelings will be replaced with newer ones. Eventually, the old ones will be a distant memory. It just takes time.

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  3. I do hope you return to happy Robyn soon. I am sorry this is such a rough time for you.

    (It probably would make you feel worse if I told you what I think of Rascal Flatts.)

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  4. Hi Robyn

    Sorry to hear you're feeling blue. Sending you lots of good karma and big hugs.

    T
    x

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  5. Sorry you're sad. I know from experience it can be difficult to leave the sadness behind. Baby steps...

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  6. Sending many hugs your way. Someone fantabulous as yourself deserves only the best, he was not the best, the best is yet to come. And that is pretty cool if you think about it!

    Love ya lots and lots!!
    Jannine

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  7. I am sorry to see this is a hard time for you. Wonderful things are always waiting. I am sure they'll be there soon. Waiting until next week to see the funny and jolly Robyn...:)

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  8. I'm so sorry Robyn, you know you can always vent to me in an email or here, as I said yesterday, we're here for you and we're not going anywhere any time soon. Happy Robyn, Sad Robyn, Funny Robyn, we love you no mattah what (sorry Long Island accent slipped out there trying to make you smile)...

    FourthGradeNothing.com

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  9. John, you are sweet. Thanks so much. It was kind of a nervous wait for the comments after a post like this, and you definitely made me feel better. xo

    Ms.A, thanks. You're a true friend. :-)

    CB, I love ya. Sorry about Rascal Flatts. This is the only song of his (theirs?) I can relate to. I won't post anymore. xo

    Tuppence, thanks dear. It helps! <-:

    Ca88, thank you for understanding and for the very helpful reminder. Baby steps.. xo

    Seductress, I love ya lots too, sis. Back to you on all of it: The best is yet to come, awesome lady! Plus, we still have to kick some **** in the Dwarf Olympics. ;-}

    Mr. Stupid, thanks. I know whenever I visit your blog, I'll be laughing. xo

    Ally, are you trying to make me cry now? Cuz you're doing pretty well. From you, I love the Long Island accent. Love ya too! [-;

    xoChocolate kisses and grateful hugs,
    Robyn

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  10. I am sorry for your pain. I hope that in time it will lessen and that you will find the true happiness you deserve.

    Lydia

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  11. I wish you well, and I hope that your sadness eases soon.
    May you continue to move forward and feel better every day.

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  12. i wont pretend i understand what you're going through, but i do know that something better is waiting for you out there :)

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  13. I'm sorry you are going through such a rough time. Big hug to you xx

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  14. Let's meet up and have a chocolate binge.

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  15. That was the perfect song for this. What a great and moving post. I've been there myself. Time passes, things get better...

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  16. Lots of hugs and warm thoughts your way... now get yourself a huge chunk of fudge!

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  17. Thank you, Lydia. I appreciate it and your visit! xo

    DDG, you're a sweetie. Thanks. :0]

    Cheri, thanks. It means a lot. xo

    Marnie, it helps. Thank you. Hugs in return! <-;

    Sarah, hope you got my msg. Yes, let's do chocolate. Soon! xo

    Pat, thanks so much. I always appreciate your feedback and warmth that comes through cyberspace. ;-0

    Baygirl, thank you kindly. I think I will. Fudge sounds really, really good. I haven't had it in a few hours or so. J/K. xo

    You're all so sweet. I appreciate your support. It helps.
    xoRobyn

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  18. Sorry you are feeling sad. I hope that now, a couple of days later, you are feeling a bit brighter.

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  19. Awww, I have been through this and I know well what you're feeling. I'm so sorry that you're going through such a painful time!
    Hope you feel better really soon.

    I'm your new follwer from FBT!
    Hope you'll visit me.
    B

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  20. I'm so sorry you have had to experience this pain in your life. But even in your pain, you have an amazing way of expressing yourself. I hope that brings you some comfort ... I know that it works as a safety valve for myself ... writing kind of purges out some of the sorrow. Hoping for better days ahead for you!

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  21. I'm sorry for all your pain. I hope you have a wonderful day!

    I am following from Follow Me Back Tuesday! I hope you'll stop by and say hi!
    http://blogginmommadrama.blogspot.com

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  22. I celebrate THAT anniversary each year with glee. I'm elated that the creep is no longer in my life. One day, I hope you, too, can celebrate in the same way. You deserve to be happy!

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  23. I had been divorced too. That anniversary didn't really stick out to me. I remembered the date and the first year I thought about it. Now I kind of forget about it. I went through alot so I know I did everything I could have done right. Oh well. I have a good hubby now. I hope you find peace in someway. I'm following you from follow me back tuesday. Stop by if you get a chance: http://angiewith2.blogspot.com/

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  24. I'm with ya Robyn...I feel the pain!

    We'll both cheer up soon!

    John

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  25. Jayne, thanks. It comes and goes. Blogging definitely helps. xo

    Betty, thank you. I'm following you along too. :-]

    RoM, I appreciate it. Thanks for caring. xo

    Lara, thanks for your comment and visit. I've done the same. ;-}

    Mar, glad you can party on that day. That's awesome. xo

    Angie, thank you, new friend. <-:

    John, yes, we shall persevere. Thanks. xo

    xo Chocolate kisses and hugs (they make Hersheys kiss hugs now, you know),
    Robyn

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  26. Robyn, I don't know what it's like to be divorced...but I do know what it's like to be sad and I really hope you'll feel better soon. We're here for you, okay?

    PS: I really love that song from Rascall Flatts

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  27. I know what will cheer you up. I will send over a cake.

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  28. Sarah, thanks. You're sweet. It is a great song, even if Cheeseboy doesn't like it. Sorry again, Cheeseboy. xo

    PTM, will it be the leftovers from the crumbs I delivered (or attempted to deliver to you) last week? Bring it on. Thanks! ;-b

    xoRobyn

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  29. Blah. What a bummer; I'm sorry. Hang in there!

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