Meet Mr. Fot, my reason #144 for maintaining celibacy. Mr. Fot messaged me in response to my ad on Plentyoffish.com, in which I’m open about being short. In reaction, Mr. Fot was a rude ass. I bounced back with snark, and Mr. Fot seemed turned on. Our discourse follows. Enjoy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. Fot's photo: 
Mr. Fot’s first message: i am a trainer coach very fot...would love to chat. can im me here or nameoffruitandbunchofnumbers@sbcglobal.net and I can send a pic
Mr. Fot’s second message before hearing back: how short ru?
Me: how fot ru?
Mr Fot: fat? lol
Me: Your ad says you're very "fot" so I thought I'd ask.
Mr. Fot: i guess hot lol
Me: If you're hot, not fot, why no shot (picture)?
Mr. Fot, through Instant Messaging: I am new separated........can email u a pic
Me: I’m only on-line briefly and hate instant messaging.
Mr. Fot: oh sory i was headed to the gym
Mr. Fot: When can we chat
Mr. Fot: id love to see you get to know u
Mr. Fot: i could email u a pic
Me: That's okay. Good luck to you.
Now you can change that one to SOL.
ReplyDeleteFot was actually the nickname of a famous Australian cricketer. It stood for "flipping old tart" or words to that effect. I think Fot 2 should be shunned because of the ludicrous number of letters in his email address.
ReplyDelete"If you're hot, not fot, why no shot?" sums up your entire relationship. Frankly, I think you threw this fish back way too soon. I'm sure you and the hot trainer coach could have lasted at least one more paragraph! Julie
ReplyDeleteUgh, Mr Fot seems like an asshole to me. Another good reason to be celibate for sure.
ReplyDeleteI guess a lot of people doing the on-line dating thing have no idea how many potential mates they rule out due to SPELLING MISTAKES! On the other hand, I guess it’s a good thing they make these errors since they can thus be quickly eliminated by those who do care about proper spelling.
ReplyDelete(Hope I didn’t make a spelling mistake here...)
I hate that. He can attach a picture to pof and keep it hidden. Then send it that way. Ugh. Men. And you know by separated he means his wife is in the next room, right?
ReplyDeleteWhat the fot is he talking about?
ReplyDeleteOK. I got nothin'.
ReplyDeleteTell him unless he's a fot cat with loads of money, no dice.
ReplyDeleteMr. Fot don't sound so hot.
ReplyDeleteEspecially if he's an "old fot."
Hahahaaa! You're my hero. Handled this PERFECTLY!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, friends.
ReplyDeleteI've said this before and I'm saying it again: I love you! Thanks for making me laugh.
xoRobyn
Robyn I think you teased this poor guy until he couldn't bare it any more.
ReplyDeleteBahahaha! This was hilarious! What a dork!
ReplyDeleteYOU are far more creative than the average girl, dear Robin! :) Thanks for another laugh!
ReplyDeleteRecently separated, huh? As in....left the house (and his wife) to go to the gym and pick up a cutie along the way. Uh uh. I'm onto Mr. Fot.
ReplyDeleteOh now there's a real winner. Bleh...
ReplyDeleteTo fot for me to handle...hehe! xo
ReplyDeleteWOW. WOW. WOW.
ReplyDeleteI haven't finished reading this yet but OMG to find someone cellibate by choice these days is refreshing.
I abstained for--drum roll please-- ten long years. And I didn't even plan it. My life was so full of activity and I simply had no time for frolicking and brain picking of the male species.
I think you handled that PERFECTLY. No sense wasting your precious time! W.C.C.
ReplyDeleteLMAO!! Mr. Fot sounds like he probably spends more time at the gym than doing anything intellectual like reading and he probably has scrape marks on his knuckles.
ReplyDeleteMore laughter. Thanks, all!
ReplyDeleteJennifer, great to "meet" you. I appreciate your comment too.
Be well, everyone but Mr. Fot.
xoRobyn
That is so weird! My gender is losing ground...
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell? lol
ReplyDeleteHe should Fot off..
;)
I guess he wasn't wearing the glass slipper..on his Fot.
lol
He's not the Fot for you.
(ok, i'll stop now).
Brilliant as always Robyn!
xo