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The Dufus
I can’t believe I gave that idiot my number last night. One sip of a gin and tonic and the hormones conquered the brain cells--my brain cells. He doesn’t have any. That pretty boy asked how beer on tap is served. When told to pay $5.50 for our drinks, he handed the bartender a five and two dimes. His vocabulary consists of “Hey” and little else.
The phone rings.
In the most robotic tone I can muster, I announce “The number you have reached is no longer in service.”
Sigh. Click.
Thank goodness it worked. What a dufus!
Excellent job Robyn and a perfectly applied, brilliant use of the prompt and brush off of a real loser in every department !!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a scathingly brilliant idea, Robyn!! xoxoxox
ReplyDeleteOh, if only that worked for ALL Dufus calls!
ReplyDeleteIn one job, my voice sounded eerily like the automated attendant. People would call me, and I'd say, "Hello", and they wouldn't speak - waiting for the rest of the automated message.
hehehe..I've done similar things when I gave out my number and later realized it was a very stupid thing to do..
ReplyDeleteGreat line! And not just for a bad date dufus – for any dufus who calls!
ReplyDeleteI have a few in mind... ;)
Could I borrow your brain and a tad of your humor? Once again, good job! Have a nice weekend!
ReplyDeletehaha thats great
ReplyDeleteThis dufus sounds strangely familiar. Oh,yeah, now I remember why. I thank God that thirty-five years ago the woman I later married (and am still married to) overlooked my shortcomings and took my call.
ReplyDeleteOh yes! What a perfect way out of bad situation!
ReplyDeleteI can see you doing that, Robyn! And enjoying every moment of it...
ReplyDeleteAlex, once again you know me too well.
ReplyDeleteKaren and Becky, thank you.
MsA, sure but you may lose all your friends in the process (except me).
Stephen, wow, 35 years? That's wonderful. I'm glad she took the call too.
Beth, all dufuses (how to spell the plural form of dufus...?). Thanks.
LunaticPope, thanks for admitting that. You have me laughing too.
June, that is REALLY funny. Sometimes people are disappointed to get a real person and not a voice mail, right? That must've been amusing (and annoying) for you.
Judie, thank you. xoxoxoxo
Nonna, thanks so much.
Awesome post. Thanks for making me laugh, and great use of the prompt. There are definitely some people I've met that I wish I tried that on!
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha! I'm sorry.\, I'm not laughing at your creativeness in faking an answering machine...that was classic! I was just remembering how my 86 year old father couldn't figure out who the strange man was everytime he called my number. Ha ha. He would leave messages saying he was sorry, but he was trying to call his daughter and he thinks he's dialed the wrong number again. And it was just my answering machine! Thanks for that memory!~Ames
ReplyDeleteLOL! I think I might of laughed during that sentence and given it away, but then again from the description of the guy I don't think he would have noticed!
ReplyDeleteBlessings, Joanne
This is great!
ReplyDeleteLOLOLOL! Love it! I could see me doing this when I was very young and not so bright when going out.
ReplyDeleteGreat take on prompt.
Blessings
Why wouldn't you loan me the fiddy cent?
ReplyDeleteLYMI
J
LOL, I thought of doing something similar but I'm glad I didn't. Mine would have paled in comparison. Loved this.
ReplyDeleteBrilliantly hilarious, Robyn! You are The Bomb!
ReplyDeleteNamaste..........cj
that was hilarious. so something I would do. Loved it.
ReplyDeleteOh so you mean when I would get that message when I was young it was YOU on the end of the line??? Cute story. W.C.C.
ReplyDeleteyou're a naughty girl, Robyn... giving your number to that idiot! lol!
ReplyDeleteseriously great job!
and i love your sense of humour!
i'm quite addicted to it!
hugs
betty xx
smart one.
ReplyDeleteJohn, I keep laughing. I'll up your fiddy cent with another nickhole.
ReplyDeleteLove ya.
WCC, um, sorry??
Thanks, everyone. Glad you enjoyed it. Keep laughing.
xoRobyn
I'd love to hear your robotic voice! A great save, but I wouldn't expect anything less! Julie
ReplyDeleteI so loved the last line...I am skipping SC this week...but couldn't resist checking out yours...a hoot!!!
ReplyDeleteHa Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! Good one, I rectum I'll just keep laughing too!!!!
ReplyDeleteLYMI!!!!!!
I don't mean to "nipple" and dine you to death!
Great one Robyn! Another experience for your book...
ReplyDeleteThanks for laughing with me, silly peeps. I love ya, ya know?!
ReplyDeletexoRobyn
Woo hoo!
ReplyDeleteWhy didn't I think of this back in the dating years!
This would have been brilliant.
I may actually try this on my mother...but ssssshhh...don't tell her!
Loved this Robyn!
Hahaha. That is awesome. Smart thinking. At least one dufus is out of your hands. :)
ReplyDelete