Thursday, August 19, 2010

On Why I Choose Celibacy, Part II ~aka Please read "What to do when your fingers get stuck to a key on your keyboard FOR DUMMIES"

(In case you couldn't tell, this is me in my typical celibacy attire.)

REASON #6 sent me a “wink,” with his fingers clearly stuck to the keyboard. Ssssee below.
for fun: ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
My first thought, naturally, was that he just forgot how to spell “solitaire.” I hate it when that happens! Don’t you? Then, I thought that perhaps he meant something even less appropriate. Maybe, just maybe, he couldn’t remember how to spell “sex.” Upon further analysis of his enlightening bio, though, I noted that his pets are spelled the exact same way. A mere coincidence?

my pets: ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Silly me! I should get my mind out of the gutter, huh? He must have a pet named “Solitaire.” There I was, accusing him of being a mutant freakazoid. Yeah, I didn't say that or publish those words or anything, but, between you and me, that's what I was thinking. Then, I read on:
favorite hot spots: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllll llllllllllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiifffffffffffffffffffffffffff fffffffffffffffffffffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Alas, I returned to a state of slight suspicion. In search of more clues, I continued.
favorite things: rap of all music BRORDERS, STAR BUCK Is that like an impoverished actor?, BELIZE, MEXICO, ...OCS.....Obsessive Compulsive S-user? ..........LOVE TO REEEEAED Please read “What to do when your fingers get stuck to a key on the keyboard FOR DUMMIES”
last read: Think and growrichs Nopolean Hill Rich dd Poor dad, cougar to rcks, wall stsssssNYTimes daily, Barrons. Gor Tiger quest. like facts..I want to wright a book How does one do this? Must one take said book on a plane, Orville and Wilbur styel? The Green House effect. it wouldsssssforshadow That’s a rather unique Green House effect. Must one own a groundhog for this? the Fin industry Tarintino stlye y Tarantino’s pretty manly, but I didn’t know he has an unattached “y.”
Before I decided to resume a life of celibacy, I needed to give him one more chance. After all, he has a PhD. He spelled it right, so it must be true. Plus, he’s still in his 20’s. How impressive! I therefore sent the prodigy this sincere inquiry:

Hi,

Thanks for the wink. I don't think we'd be a good match, but I am curious about your profile. What does "sssss" mean, in reference to both your favorite hobbies and pets?

And "eeeellllliiiiiffffeeee.." for hot spots?

Interesting.

Have a good one!
Robyn

I'm still awaiting a response. He's probably busy playing s's with his s's. I figure it'll be a while. It's a good thing I'm such a patient, gracious kinda gal. He has a PhD, you know?!
And that, my friend, is reason #6, Part II of On Why I Choose Celibacy.

26 comments:

  1. Mysterious fellow. I think he might be part snake.

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  2. I figured it out. He is part snake!! or mostly snake with only human arms. I should know my 3rd cousin 6 times removed is part Cobra.

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  3. I'm going to really dork out and say he's part of ssssssssssssssssslytherin.

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  4. Now he is definitely the one who checks off the "other" box on those surveys and applications. I'll bet you anything he does that...clearly a sepcial guy. LOL!!

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  5. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

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  6. Run!! Run away!!!!! Maybe he has a cat on his keyboard.

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  7. wow

    I never knew you were a super hero... or sorts..

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  8. maybe he's ten or twelve and can't spell or type. sssssssounddddsssss liiiiiiiiiiike ittttttttt.

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  9. Bizarre. LOL

    Funny blog! Thanks for visiting mine, as well. Have a good weekend!

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  10. dddddoooonnn't mmmaaaakkkeee ffffuuuunnn offff ppppeeeeoooopppplllleee wwwwiiiitttthhhhh nnnneeeerrrvoooouuuusss twwwwiiiitttccchhhheeeesss.

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  11. PhD in stupidity from school of morons I'm sure.

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  12. Maybe his pet sat on his keyboard?

    Or maybe he was busy playing with his eeeellllliiiiiffffeeee.

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  13. No biggie. My doctor LOVES Star Buck.

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  14. Invisible Seductress just cracked me up! Too funny.

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  15. GB, I think you're right. Which part? Ah, never mind. xo

    PTM, it's a good thing that Cobra cousin is 6 times removed from you. For your sake, I hope the guy keeps moving. :0]

    Copyboy, I had to look that one up. That's another possibility. Do they have pet s's? xo

    Marnie, yes, he is quite "otherly" and special. He's sepcial too! ;0D

    Bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb xo

    Marlene, I ran all the way to Star Buck. Then I went to Brorders. He didn't find me. I think I'm in the clear. d-:

    SirT, I do what I can to repel evil -uh- entities. xo

    CalGirl, it does seem that wayy y. Thanks.:-)

    SDP, thank you for stopping by, and for enjoying the weirdness. Have a great weekend yourself. xo

    TIS, you know that I'm not making fun of this nervous mutant freakazoid just because I'm cold hearted, right? It's also because I want to entertain my readerssssss. Hugs. <-:

    Sarah, I love it! It seems the place where all these guys studied. xo

    DDG, true. He may have a kind cat, trying to block all women from seeing his adddddd. :0}

    Cheeseboy, is your doc in his 20's, with OCS and S pets too? Imagine the odds! They are quite odd. xo

    Marnie, she is a card, that beloved jokester Seductresssssss. [-:

    Happy weekendsssssssss,
    xoRobyn

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  16. Step away very slowly before he sees you trying to run...

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  17. Robyn, your response to him was very kind. Some meaner types might have told him, "You have a very funny foot...here's hoping that you find a funny shoe!"

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  18. Jesus.. what a sssssscary fkr..and you contacted him? You're brave.. He'sssss probably a sssssserial killeeeerrr...

    I think the young ones have a tendenacy to add lots of eeee's and iiiii's as in Hiiiiiieeeee!!!! It makes them seem like Ecstasy freaks at a Clown Fair.. and i know how you love clowns..
    mmm.. just too weird..
    A lifetime of singledom for some..

    x
    =]

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  19. There really are some strange guys out there!!

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  20. Star Buck is great! its not everyday you meet anyone who can speak parseltongue.

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  21. You all make me laugh, and I love you for it.

    BabySis, I did, on tip toes. Then I knocked over a chair. But he was oblivious. His hisssssssing drowned out my noise. :-]

    Margaret, that's good. I do think we're both being too nice, though, and could've used other "f" words besides "funny." xo

    MsA, exactly!! At age 26 too! I wonder what PHD stands for in his case. (-:

    Anthony, perfect! I love your response, and I'm still laughing. He is indeed a sssscary fkr. xo

    Gayle, indeed there are, very sssstrange. ;-}

    BayGirl, I love that word, "Parseltongue." It seems to be the main language amongst today's bachelors. Lord help today's bachelorettes - except for the ones who go on Tv. Well, and everyone else except me. xo

    Hugsssssss,
    xoRobyn

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  22. Run away...
    don't walk, runnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

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  23. ssssoooo sssseexxxxiiii!!

    I once refused to date a guy because he sent me an email with "u r nice" or something like that. I'm sorry, but if you can't take the time to type out the extra 2 letters, I'm pretty sure you're not going to treat me the way I need to be treated. I'm worth ALL THREE LETTERS!

    Just like how you are worth ACTUAL information and not just a sticky keyboard. I mean, think about WHY it's sticky - clearly he's not date worthy!

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  24. Pat, Thank you!!! I didddddd. xo

    WomanConfused, girlfriend, that's what I'm saying! THANK YOU!! xo

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