Regrettably, I'm not contributing. In part, I'm too insecure. I've also had other big projects to tackle. But I do want to shout "Happy 3rd Anniversary!" to the Insecure Writer's Support Group. Thank you, Alex, for facilitating three years of encouragement, support, angst, tears, hysteria, and random fun.
To celebrate, I tried to invite someone really important to my studio. Danny DeVito's rates were too high, though, so Queen Elizabeth II came over from across the pond!
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The Queen --robust and manly, wide and ever devoid of personality -- rides in on her thoroughbred named Sir Loin. "Harder, faster! Sir Loin!" she shouts, whacking his rear with her stick. She sees the camera and yelps towards it, clearly delirious: "1992 is not a year on which I shall
look back with undiluted pleasure. In the words of one of my more sympathetic
correspondents, it has turned out to be an Annus Horribilis."*
"That's not my business, lady," I tell her. "Keep it clean around here. It ain't that kind of party."
"That's not my business, lady," I tell her. "Keep it clean around here. It ain't that kind of party."
The Queen, 88 years old and counting, springs from her horse and does some acrobatics."Ta ta, cheerios, English muffins, carry on!"
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Happy Birthday, IWSG!
*Actual quote by Queen Elizabeth II.
Wikipedia, US Weekly, and the Official Magazine Britain were abused in the making of this post.
I do hope that the Queen realised how privileged she was to be featured here.
ReplyDeleteAnd happy, happy birthday to all the ISWG team. Long may they wrestle their insecurities into submission.
It's unbelievable what great shape the Queen's in at eighty-eight! The only horse I'd be brave enough to saddle up on is DuPont!
ReplyDeleteJulie
My goodness, I never realised she was 88! She doesn't look a day older than 77. That's what living in the cloudy English climate does for a girl, Robyn. That and the Branston's pickle she rubs into her face every night.
ReplyDeleteI remember when she said that. The Queen and I are very close since we both are royalty.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
To the Queen!
ReplyDeleteI heard some non-locals here say "feliz come-plea-anus" for happy birthday. They were English. I wonder if they're of royal blood.
Is that Sir Loin of Beef? If not, I knight thee!
ReplyDeleteI hope I do as well as the Queen.
Thanks Robyn for being a part of the group for the last three years!
Riding at 88? Just don't fall off.
ReplyDeleteI love visiting you. You always make me laugh. "It ain't that kind of party" - I almost spit out my soda. Thanks for the chuckle!
ReplyDeleteElsie
co-host IWSG
♡♥♡♥
Hey, the Queen has lots of personality, just not very pleasant.
ReplyDelete"Harder, faster, Sir Loin!" made me think of the first dirty joke my Mom ever told me about 45 years ago. It concerned the Queen too. Here it is:
ReplyDeleteWhat did the Queen say to Prince Philip on their wedding night?
"Mount, Batten!"
Hilarious, I know, but there you go.
You just never know who you're going to see guest posting! :)
ReplyDeleteThat Queen, she is quite a character! I'm a little disappointed you couldn't get Danny DeVito, though. :D Happy Wednesday to you, Robyn. Thanks for the smiles today.
ReplyDeleteEven though it is Latin, I could not help but giggle when I heard her say it. Now when she was talking to Sir Loin of Beef, are you sure she wasn't thinking about Prince Philip??
ReplyDeleteI always find the 'royals' amusing as viewed from across the ocean kind of way. Like crazy distant relatives we love but are glad they don't live nearby.
ReplyDeleteI never knew how old the Queen was, and for some reason I thought she was younger. Wow!
ReplyDeleteRiding at 88 and she doesn't break in half? Must be used to some bloody fine umm wankers lol
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, this post is friggin hilarious. You seriously just made my day.
ReplyDeleteThe Queen's a tough old bird. My ex husband really wanted to live long enough to finally see a King of England in his lifetime. He passed away 2 years ago, but the way the Queen is going, none of us may see a King in our lifetime!
ReplyDeleteWhat more appropriate way to celebrate than with the Queen. Awesome.
ReplyDeleteHahaha...you always make me smile, Robyn! She's 88??!! Amazing. She's in great shape; better than her son.
ReplyDeletecrazy good fun and wacky post. You are SO creative. Move on from insecurity - chin up and tally ho.
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine how tired Prince Charles must be waiting for her to step down and let him be King?
ReplyDeleteat least you made us laugh even if you're not participating! ((hugs))
ReplyDelete1992. That was actually a pretty good year for me. If I could go back and do it again, I think I would choose differently, however. I like to think that another me in another dimension did. I wonder how her life turned out???
ReplyDeleteMan, is there a support group or charity you're NOT a part of?
ReplyDeleteGeez, Danny, you couldn't give a discount? Ah well, at least the Queen stopped by.
ReplyDeleteThank you, my sillies.
ReplyDeleteMitchell, haha! Sounds like the Brits have perverse birthday celebrations.
Alex, worse - Sir Loin of Pork.
Debra, it's awesome that your mom told you that joke 45 years ago. The joke isn't good, but your mom is/was.
LD, yet he has to act as if he's happy she's still alive.
Smiles 'n hugs, all.
xoRobyn
I'm always amazed at the fact that she just keeps going and going...maybe she has energizer batteries somewhere in her back?
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty impressive that she can still ride a horse at 88 years old!
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't think Danny's worth his pay anyway, so you got a real bargain with the queen! Long live the queen (so Robyn can keep cracking us up with snarky comments about her!)
ReplyDeleteThe VERY FIRST thing I thought when I saw the cover about the Queen having a pony was that episode in Seinfeld when Jerry was poking fun at little kids having ponies.
ReplyDeleteI kept hearing his aunt (?) Aunt Vania (?) saying, "When I was little girl in Poland, I had a pony."
My SECOND thought when I saw the picture of the Queen? I'd do her.
Yes, I'm a sad little man.
Stop it, Al! Then again, she does look rather flexible. I'd do her too. Look what you started!
ReplyDeleteLove ya all and Al.
xoRobyn