Monday, November 26, 2012

Top 10 Dating Ads from 2012

                                        a perplexed Bachelor Ben courtesy of google images

As 2012 comes to a close, Life by Chocolate proudly (or, in this case, shamefully) presents a series of the year's Top 10.  Today, we're looking back at the best of the worst dating ad snippets. I hope this brings laughter.  

In reverse order, here they are:

10) I,m well grounded
And so is your apostrophe.

9) I am attending the local junior collage in town.
Keep attending, babe. Keep attending.

8) New in town and ready to get in!! Sounds sexual. Judging from your shirtless photo and delightfully chiseled abs, I’d like to invite you to do so. I mean - clearing throat and composing self -  good luck to you, sir. Have a nice day.

7)  what does a guy got to do to get a gril Save $100. Visit Walmart’s Patio and Garden department. They should be able to assist you from there.

6) for leisure; i like to go for walks at the park i also like to ride my bike there on the bike baths or just have a nice panic by the lake.
Sounds lovely, darling, but I prefer to have nice panics in private.

 5) I'm distrustful of gnomes.
I’m distrustful of men who are distrustful of gnomes.

4) You can call me Jim (no it's not MY name) but, it's only fair since I call everyone "Jim"

3) Lets play in traffic
Okay, you go first!

2) pork  
No thanks, I’m Jewish.


This one, I'm not touching.

1) I'm a Clyde looking for my Boney

CONGRATULATIONS, Mr. Clyde! We’d like to offer you your Boney, but we can’t do that here. Good luck on your search.


  1. While I love all of these the tenth and last ones are both my favourites although the tenth one is only so good due to your hilarious "so is your comma," line while the first is funny because of the sheer idiocy of spelling Bonnie as "Boney," great post Robyn, I love this.

  2. Someone should tell grill guy that a grill is much cheaper to maintain than a girl anyway.
    I remember most of those. How scary is that?

  3. These are always so funny! I love the well grounded best still.

  4. LOL what a flock you always find, many seem to have less than half a mind

  5. Reminds me of that song from Urban Cowboy, Lookin' for Love in All the Wrong Places

  6. ho ho - I had to chuckle big time at the guy looking for a gril xo

  7. I remember these and your comments make them ALL great!

  8. You're so right not to touch the Boney (which might go off in your hand), but I think you should give the gnome-phobic guy a chance. How much of a sacrifice would it be to avoid gnomes for the rest of your life?

  9. Lots of funny here. I hope poor Clyde finds his Boney, or at least the spell check button.

  10. YW, thank you. Yeah, I'll never forget the sheer idiocy of "Boney."

    Alex, true. But he probably wouldn't know the difference between a gril and a girl. Sorry for re-posting. It was bad enough the first time.

    Terra, thanks.

    PatHatt, less, much less.

    IT, I think about that song a lot too. Wonder why ?!

    David, poor guy will never quite find what he's looking for.

    MsA, thanks. They make mockery rather easy.

    GB, you are always (or sometimes) very rational. Good point. But gnomes can be cute.

    Stephen, I hope he finds spellcheck. He could be dangerous if he finds his Boney.

    Thanks, all. Keep a smile.

  11. I think #10 could use a Verbal Viagra.
    So he could get his apostrophe up.

  12. Good one, Al. And if he keeps it up, he might have some luck with the ladies.


  13. 6- What's a bike bath? Would not the bike rust?

  14. Bahahahaha! Last one, clearly the winner! Hope you had a nice Thanksgiving!

  15. You always liven up these losers with your witty comments! I would've loved to see you interact with Bachelor Ben!

  16. Julie, thank you. I would've taken scissors to that dude's hair. It's awful!

    Yvonne, yeah, it took no time for me to declare a winner.

    Ruth, a bike bath is for bikes averse to showering..? Um, I got nothing. Be well.

    Keep a smile, friends.

  17. You know they are arrogant enough to not see the problem with their presentation which is basically "I am Man and I am here." They're probably also thinking "Why don't these grils and bitches want to have sex with me?"

  18. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Going to tweet this, LOL!

  19. Hilarious but sometimes I can't help but feel sorry for these poor blokes!

  20. Those are all still great!! Your number 1 is still out-loud funny. Please keep posting these...I feel so much smarter every time I read one of these lists.

  21. Hahaha. 8 and 7 were by far my favorites.

  22. Haha - missed this one - phew, what a cracker! There's been some great ones all year.
    The internet is a wild place, that's for sure. I was never scared of the general populace until now - thanks for that Robyn! lol

  23. Thanks, all. So long as their are men to mock, you can count on me!