from Google images
Hi
there! Lifted directly from popular on-line dating sites, and embellished by my
italicized snark, I now present reasons 201 through 208 for [not just me but]
any straight, single woman to choose celibacy. Excepting the last two, these
are all internet dating ad headlines. Please enjoy...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
REASON
#201: I'm distrustful of
gnomes.
I’m distrustful of men who are
distrustful of gnomes.
REASON #202: Headline Shmedline
Weirdo
Shmeirdo
REASON
#203:
No
"No"? That’s your headline? I can’t
think of a weirder way to promote yourself. Wait, here’s one:
REASON
#204:
Man bites dog
Upon
further research, I see that this is a movie title. Still, it’s a weird
personal ad headline!
REASON
#205:
Headline
You’re
not a creative type, I take it.
This one I'm not touching:
REASON #206: I'm a Clyde looking
for my Boney
REASON
#207:
I,m well grounded
And
so is your apostrophe.
REASON #208: For the last year I lived on a yatch, and I lopve it.
Curiously,
I posted this one over a year ago. But I see you’ve grown to lopve your yatch since then.
Glad someone does.
LOVE your comment on the apostrophe!
ReplyDeleteI really laughed at the apostrophy being grounded and the Clyde and Boney thing was hilarious too. I definitely have a level of distrust for a bloke who is distrustful of gnomes, I guess he thought he was being funny or something.
ReplyDeleteThat first dude is not going to save the money he could by shunning Travelocity and it's gnome.
ReplyDelete#207 got me! And #201 doesn't trust gnomes? I wouldn't trust him either.
ReplyDeleteThe guy who said 'No' must be hearing voices. He might have been responding to a female voice saying "Leave me alone, you pervert!".
ReplyDeleteMsA, thanks.
ReplyDeleteYW, the word "bloke" is a good one. We don't use it much, or at all, here, but anyone distrusting of gnomes is a true bloke.
Ruth, yeah. He clearly didn't think it through, or he clearly just doesn't think.
Alex, thanks for affirming my distrust in a man who distrusts gnomes.
GB, I think you're onto something. Sounds feasible.
Keep smiling, all.
xoRobyn
These are all great! It would be fun to put on a beret, and set up a meeting with Clyde! So what if he can't spell. I'm sure you, Clyde and your police escort would be in for an eventful evening! Julie
ReplyDeleteLOL well the first one at least admitted it, yeah I'd never touch Boney either hahaha
ReplyDeleteWow! There are some spectacularly illiterate people out there is lala land. I doubt you'll change your name to Boney though. That one made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteHas anyone thought of offering some inexpensive (obviously on-line) tutoring for these blokes? For a few dollars per ad or even less, I reckon you'd be well on the way to being wealthy very quickly. Offer some over the top promises about how they'd be more successful in their quest for true love etc and taa daa!!
ReplyDeletethanks for the laugh Robyn
Sue
oh lord! these are ridiculously funny!
ReplyDeleteClyde and Boney? Shaking my head and laughing.
ReplyDeleteoh man!
ReplyDeletethese are hilarious! here i am wiping coffee from my laptop screen and it's all your fault!
xoxo
LMAO! One wonders what passes through their minds as they type. Probably nothing, it's clearly not the big head that is doing the thinking.
ReplyDeleteI think 207 made me laugh the most!
ReplyDeleteExcellent reasons for celibacy! Oh my!!
ReplyDeleteHmm, from what I can remember of BONNIE AND CLYDE, Clyde was looking for his Boney there too. Found it at the end right before they were mowed down by a thousand machine guns. You're right, celibacy is better!
ReplyDeleteJulie, that would be interesting. Can I recruit you to go in my place, though? I'm scared.
ReplyDeletePat, I'm not touching your comment about not touching Boney. Good response.
Chuck, nah, I'll stick with Robyn. Glad to make you laugh.
Sue, there should be a niche there, though I think these men believe they're brilliant.
Yvonne, Oh Lord is right.
Stephen, I'm still doing the same.
Betty, I'm sorry and glad. Thanks.
Melly, one wonders if there's even a brain in the big head.
Terra, it is rather humorous to see a comma used in place of an apostrophe, by a well grounded man no less.
Cheryl, thanks for affirming that.
Margaret, good to see you. That's funny. I didn't remember how the movie ended. At least he found his Boney before dying.
Keep a smile, all.
xoRobyn
I'm actually distrustful of gnomes, so that #201 guy and I might be a match :)
ReplyDeleteshow me the way to go gnome - hopefully not on a yatch, whic sounds like an unpleasant place to hang out - there are always great Robyn x
ReplyDeleteThat picture of the gnome is right up my alley (ooh, that's probably an unfortunate phrase).
ReplyDeleteYeah, I wouldn't trust the gnome distruster either. Who does that? Such a creative group this time!! :)
ReplyDelete