And I Wrote This Book.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Hallbark Greeting Card, a Saturday Centus


Our beloved Saturday Centus teacher, Jenny Matlock, has asked that we use this romantic image as inspiration for a Hallmark-ish Valentine greeting. The heartfelt message must not exceed 50 words.

I hope my contribution brings Hallmark down once and for all, in favor of a new line of Hallbark cards. You know, for dogs. Enjoy. Maybe. If not, who created this post? Darn hackers!
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A Hallbark Creation

I’m a sad lowly mutt from Pom Beaitch

With a fetish for dressing in kitsch

They say “Dawg, your singing is pitch!”

Yo, I ain’t no looker, and I ain’t rich

But I really want you for my

Valentine.

40 comments:

  1. Very good..."Hallbark Cards" and blame on those "darn hackers" Love it !!!

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  2. You wait right next to that phone Robyn! :D This was too funny!!~Ames

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  3. I have a friend who has pugs and she will die when I show this to her! Too funny...and nice verse.

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  4. Heehee!! I love it!!! You crack me up!

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  5. That poor dog! But your heartfelt sentiment is precious! :)

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  6. Oh my, this was really good. Perhaps your best yet.

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  7. Robyn, Hallmark called and said the job is yours if you want it!!

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  8. Folks would buy Hallbark, especially if all of the cards were this witty! Have you found a new career???

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  9. Hahaha that's funny. I would buy this card, not just for someone else, but just for myself.

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  10. Is this poem about Randy Jackson from AI? Either way it's funny.

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  11. Your poem is perfect for that picture. I laughed so hard I was breathless when I saw that photo!

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  12. Nonna, so glad you like it and were so quick to comment. Thank you. xo

    Ames, it hasn't rung yet. I'll give 'em til the end of the day on Monday. Thanks. ;0)

    Chuck, I'm so glad you're passing this on. I hope your friend's dogs find it helpful. Keep me posted. Thanks. [~:

    Marlene, thank you. Smiles. xo

    June, that would be fun. Then again, I'm not sure I have thick enough skin for all the barking customers. =o)

    Beth, he really does look pathetic, but in an endearing way. xo

    OT, thanks so much. {-;

    Happier, thank yo. I mean you. xo

    Judie, woohoo! Did you get a salary quote? What does my vacation package look like? Is it a union position? =-]

    Nancy, thanks. I'm not sure. This business is for the dogs. Thanks. xo

    Loveable, I'm glad you enjoyed it, and it's always good to see you. {~:

    Cheeseboy, it does have Randy's influence. Thanks. xo

    Alex, yeah, Jenny did a wonderful job finding this prompt. Glad it made you laugh. =o]

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  13. I would definitely buy one...halbark or any bark for that sake....fab :)

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  14. Bwahahaha! Hallbark! I loved your card. Perfect use of this silly prompt. Kat

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  15. Pom Beiatch...I bet that place is better to hang in than where I'm at now!
    Aren't you so clever!

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  16. I wish I was as talented as you. All I can write are limericks. And bawdy haikus. Very nicely done!

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  17. Robyn...so clever and funny...way cool ;-) Peace and blessings and much love...

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  18. I need to find that costume! my pug would be awsome

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  19. Oh my gosh. This is just hilarious!

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  20. I want to borrow it for my card to a friend. There are some similarities there between her and the dawg...

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  21. Dang...I want to be puggie's valentine too!

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  22. Rekha, thank you. I wish I had a dog to give this to. ;0)

    Kat, thanks. Jenny did really well with this one. xo

    Sandra, I haven't been to Pom Beaitch, but it does sound exotic. Or, at least, intersting. Thanks. [~;

    Thanks BabySis. xo

    Al, can't wait to see your limericks and bawdy haikus. Thanks.=o)

    Deborah, I'm glad you enjoyed it. xo

    Jeff, thank you, kind man. All the good things back to you with chocolate. [-:

    Baygirl, you'll need to post that one. xo

    Betty, glad to make you laugh. =~]

    Jo, thank you. We both had fun with this one, yo. xo

    Sarah, that's a bit scary, but feel free to borrow it. Let me know if she barks at you for it. <o:

    5thsis, he is endearing, isn't he? xo

    Haze, thank you for the comment and visit. =}

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  23. Robin,

    ABOUT YOUR REMARK ON MY BLOG...

    Darling, I think you are my sister from a Jewish mister! Seriously, you are such a hoot!I like your idea, let's declare tomorrow national chocolate day! I think that is brilliant!

    Anyway, I am NOT stronger than you! I just give up sugar one day at a time. It's my daily choice. At 51, I feel better when I am not on a sugar high, and then dumped on my ass after the sugar wears off. That is so painful for me. You see, I can't eat just one piece of chocolate. I will eat a one pound box of See's candy in two days. (or can I be honest and say a day and a half)

    Sugar causes inflamation in our bodies. Inflamation causes all sorts of disease, like arthritis, diabetes, kidney disease...the list is long.

    I was so inflamed, seriously! My whole body ached all the time from all the crap I was ingesting, particularly sugar. This is why I decided the pain of the sugar was greater than the joy I felt eating it. (I don't know if that makes sense)

    I just re-joined the Italian American club of Maui, and today they met at the winery in the mountains of Maui. We had a chocolate buffet, and I indulged in a couple (4) different tasty chocolate treats. Once a month or so is not gonna kill me. Pound and pounds every day of the stuff will.

    What I know about life is that I can't ALWAYS or NEVER do anything. I got rid of that mentality, or I will drive myself crazy. So just for today, I allowed myself a chocolate plate of goodies to participate in the celebration. Was it worth it? Not so much. I have gotten more pleasure out of my dark chocolate bar I keep in my refrigerator for emergencies. I am not craving the sweet anymore. It has been 5 1/2 months of abstaining from sugar and wheat, and I lost fifteen pounds and feel sooooo much better. (I eat like a pig, and lose weight, who would of thought?)

    Okay, kick me off my soapbox, I am rambling.

    Have Valentine's Day Robin! I will be thinking of my soul sister in Paradise and toasting my singleness with you!

    Aloha!
    Lisa xo

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  24. inspired verse, Robyn...yeah I think it's not easy to chill with kids. One can drift very quickly into anality. David.

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  25. Lisa, you have me in stitches again, sister! I am inspired by you, though. I do feel the (bad) effects of sugar/chocolate on my body and completely understand. I'm just not there yet, but I admire you. You're also right not to abstain altogether. Abstinence (in any realm) only causes misery. Big hugs for a happy chocolate day in Paradise. xo

    David, thanks. Hope you have some anality-free moments on V-day. ;0)

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  26. LOL! You had me at "Hallbark!" Simply brilliant!

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  27. hahah - That dawg is hot!!!
    I might turn...

    ;)

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  28. Oh girl!

    I'm reading these on a dreary Arizona winter weekend and laughing my butt off.

    This was really hilarious. My husband thinks I'm crazy cuz I keep calling him in his office and reading them out loud to him.

    Guess I should just make him read all the links!

    Thanks for being such a good sport AND totally rocking this prompt.

    You are a gem!

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  29. Dear Robyn,
    Sorry that I am late with my comments. I am working backwards trying to visit everyone that I have missed earlier.

    Thank you for your kind words about my Hallmark-post. I really like yours. I think Hallmark should consider your idea for a new line of canine-cards! Doggies have the right to a love-life, don't they?

    You put a smile on my face!
    Best wishes,
    Anna
    For the benefit of other readers:
    Anna's SC-wk 41 Canine-Valentine

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