Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Will You Be Mine?

Dear You, beloved reader,

Will you be mine? I'm not just asking because I have no other options for Valentine's Day. It's not only because I just spent hours scouring the streets of this fine town and came up empty. Nor is it because I'm desperate. See, I prepared this fabulous Valentine's dinner - spaghetti and meatballs, and garlic bread. For dessert, I've a massive double chocolate cream cheese cake in the oven. I'll even let you try a sliver. Plus, here's an array of cheap, tacky wines to choose from. It's all way too much for just me. Um, I just remembered this picture's a couple years old, so the food may be a bit cold. No worries. I have a microwave. Oh, I don't live there anymore. Don't fret. I'm a quick jaunt across town and easy to find.

So what do you say, gorgeous, bright, kind-hearted you? Please keep in mind that I'm putting my ego on the line here. It's already a delicate, microscopic little thing. So your answer will either cause uncontrollable chronic mania or severe incurable depression. It's up to you. I have faith that you'll make the right choice here.

Truth is, to get a bit sappy, I do like you a lot. You're far superior to all the rest. Well, that's not saying much. But let me break it down here to emphasize your virtues: You never wake me up with your snoring. You never hog the bedsheets or complain that I do. I haven't noticed you leaving your dirty socks on the coffee table. And you never come home to me in a piss-ass mood.

It did take you a while to notice me. (I had 7 followers for the longest time until you found me.) I suppose I can forgive that, being as I'm short and all. You do appreciate me and my silliness, so that's what counts. Our interactions are great. We think alike and have shared interests. Our arguments are rare and short lived. I appreciate that you don't hold a grudge, and you don't seem to notice that I do. You're pretty open minded too, which I like. You're quick witted, another plus.

You came into my life unexpectedly and perked up my spirits. You're very supportive and encouraging. Moreover, you've been following me, and that makes me feel like a cult leader who should be offering you brownies. It also makes me feel special. I suppose I should make you some special brownies.


Just more thing, though. I'll be out of town this weekend, returning on Valentine's Day. If you get here before me, you can find the key under the mat. Make yourself at home. Feel free to bring a date. Oh, and I'll really miss you this weekend.

How about it? Will you be mine? Please say yes. Please say yes....holding my breath until you do.

Milk and dark chocolate kisses,
Robyn

18 comments:

  1. I'm hoping he will read this! Goodness Gracious!!!

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  2. One of the 58 that chose you to brighten my smile each day. There will be many more but you always make me feel special!! Hugs back

    Does a animal plushie count as a date if it can talk when you squeeze it's paw?? I hope so because he said yes to dinner and a movie!

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  3. I hope that he says "Yes!"

    By the way, you won't die holding your breath, you'll start breathing normally ... after you have passed out! LOL!!!

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  4. This is brilliant but who are you talking to?!

    I hope you won't leave us in the dark...!

    Rapunzel x

    www.talesfromthetower.co.uk

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  5. Is anyone worth this much effort? This much sacrifice? This much time? This much anything? Rather than chasing after the right person. Become the person worth being chased after. You can do it. I know you can.

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  6. me! me! i will be there. i will be yours! (hope you don't mind i'm the wrong sex)

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  7. I want to know! I want to know! If you weren't living probably hours and hours away, I'd go and hang out with you for the day! :P

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  8. I'm talking to YOU. YOU - the person in the mirror! (Guess I'll need to make it more clear.)
    Local Sarah will be my date. What about the rest of you?
    Canadian Sarah - that would be so much fun!
    Seductress, yes, animal plushies count, in my book any way. They're so much better than other options. Wouldn't you say?
    Blase, you always make me laugh.
    DDG, ah, good point. I kinda went too far with the silliness factor there. Didn't mean to suggest anything strange.

    chocolate kisses, all,
    xo Robyn

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  9. Excellent invitation - would love a sliver of chocolate cheesecake!

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  10. If I were closer to you, not married, etc, I'd be there in a heartbeat :)

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  11. :)
    I'd love too, if I didn't live on the other side of the world.

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  12. Hey I will in the virtual sense but only if you don't make me eat chocolate!

    Kate xxx

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  13. Do you even need to ask? Haha. I better see chocolate strawberries on that table!!!!

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  14. Have a Happy Valentines Day Robyn and I'll STAY your friend so long as I DON'T have to eat that spaghetti! Now.. the double chocolate cream cheese cake on the other hand.. mmmmm yummmmy :D

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  15. I'm moved to make a second double chocolate cream cheese cake. This one will be a bit more fresh. Plus, I'll give you a full slice. (You'll just need to split it about 12 ways.) Kate, how about apple pie?

    Gorilla Bananas, I've never been asked. But I'll try anything once. Maybe. Are we talking a fine toothed comb? Soft-bristled brush? TCB scalp care?

    xoRobyn

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