Monday, August 21, 2017

View from the Moon, and Short People CAN Walk!

Hi, Sillies,
How are you?
Please be well and in good spirits. Thank you.

I was imagining a view from the moon (or worse, the sun) today -- hundreds of thousands of school kids, adults, anyone who likes a good show, all staring up at it to catch a glimpse of the total eclipse. Could this country's people look sillier? Oops, we probably have and could.
Or maybe not!
I copied this in "Sunscreen" filter for your retinal protection. 
Regardless, I don't recommend staring directly at it for any length of time. 

Speaking of silly, someone said the most silly and bizarre thing to me yesterday. I was at a picnic, and a friend's much older relative said "It's strange to see such a short person walking around like that". Really? I've had nearly 50 years of practice at it! Yeah, they let us short ones roam around on weekends. They even loosen the wardrobe restrictions. We can expose nips and kneecaps on casual Fridays. Ha! They assume mine are in proportion to my size. Wait til they see these girls!

 "What does being small have to do with walking around? I'm perfectly mobile."

"Oh don't mind me. I'm an old lady, my brain is foggy. I meant that you're cute as the devil." Great! Who doesn't want to be as adorable as the devil? I've only danced with him briefly. When he and I get together, it's for a quickie at best. I have to close my eyes too. 
Then, at the same time, she and I said "The devil isn't cute."

Flustered --she had no more feet to put in her mouth-- the old lady went for Strike 3. "Well I meant that you're cute as a button." Where does that phrase come from? Nobody seems to know for sure. It's thought that because buttons are small, they are cute. That's stupid. If you need a microscope to find it, there's nothing "cute" about the mission.  Give me something I can work with, for a change.
At this point, I quickly moved away. I wouldn't tolerate witnessing her take another turn at bat. 

Later, I told my friend what his relative had said to me. We laughed about it, and he claimed to have no idea who she is. I can't blame him - such a tall person walking around like that. It's a strange thing.

Have a good evening and week, my friends. 

51 comments:

  1. Her tall altitude kept her from enough oxygen to the brain
    Crazy- keep laughing. That's all you can do
    Happy Eclipse Day. I had fun with friends in
    Jersey

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    1. You're in Jersey? Sounds exciting. Can't wait to learn about that trip. Be well, Joanne.

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  2. So you were out walking around like THAT again?? When will you ever learn? You could have asked, "How's the air up there? Kind of thin, eh? Do storm clouds ever form around your head?" I could go on, but I would bet you are much better at it.

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    1. Well, when they let me out of the dungeon, I like to let the blood circulate a bit. You know, Jono? ;~)

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  3. I read that short people earn less than tall people, but short people live longer.

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    1. We are constantly put down, Stephen, as if we could afford to be put down further. But our health is better than that of tall folks. I think they get the short end of the stick, ironically.

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  4. What a strange thing to think, even stranger to say out loud. Well, you broadened her horizons. Thanks for using the "sunscreen" filter - my eyes appreciate it.

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    1. No problem, Wilma. I don't want anyone straining their eyes. Smiles.

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  5. Maybe she thinks short people crawl and that's why they are so short.
    Eclipse was rather faint here. I did borrow someone's special glasses though.

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    1. I didn't think about that possibility, Alex. But you have more logic than she.
      Yeah, it was cloudy around here, too, but the glasses really worked.

      Delete
  6. So....did she think she could dress you up in Barbie clothes?? I swear some old people are just idiots. Now being old has nothing to do with it...being a idiot of course but sometimes they say and think things that belong from another century

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    1. I agree. I was thinking that I hope I don't say stupid, rude things like that when my brain gets even foggier. But age is no excuse. Idiots are idiots.

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  7. Sigh. Part of me feels sorry for that woman digging herself in deeper and deeper. And the other part (which is larger) is uncertain whether to growl or spit. So consider me doing both.

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  8. Was she actually walking around or only using her feet as mouth-fillers?

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  9. Let's take it step by step. First, yeah, what did she mean by her initial statement? "I've never seen anyone under 5'7" in my life! Then again, I am only friends with the Harlem Globetrotters." Second, I take issue with both of you. Of course the Devil is cute. You can't seduce people to sell their souls if you look like Steve Bannon. Finally, you need a microscope to find a button? I have the number of a great optometrist for you. Also, things you have to use a microscope to find are often cute. Look up Tardigrades, or Moss Piglets. Those things are adorable. I know, not the point.

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    1. You have a solid counter argument in reference to Bannon, PVP. I stand corrected. But I find the Tardigrads and Moss Piglets creepy looking. Eww, not adorable. Yikes.

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  10. To be fair to her, a few people do find the Devil cute, but they are mostly pagan, goat-skin wearing types. I wouldn't find it strange if you were walking, running or skipping, Robyn!

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  11. I can walk AND run. I bet that really would've stunned her.

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  12. She sure came up short.

    What the heck did she think? Short people fly around? Get pushed? Crawl? Clearly when she grew her brains didn't grow with her.

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    1. She's a tall old lady with brain cells in short supply, Pat.
      Imagine walking around like that!

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  13. Wow, what a bizarre thing to say! I do have to agree with her on one point, though, I'm sure she has a foggy brain. Good grief.

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    1. Ha. Yes, the foggy brain thing.
      Thank you, Connie.

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  14. So your owner let you out of your cage to get some exercise? That was nice. I hope you didn't attack anyone's ankles.

    Love,
    Janie

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  15. Robyn, you're beautiful. I'm cute as a button.

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    1. Aw shucks, Geo. I don't know about any of that.
      We're both beautiful.
      In fact, we're all beautiful.
      Thank you.

      Delete
  16. Wow she really has a way of making things get awkward from zero to 100 in seconds.

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    1. Ha! Yeah, she did that. I'm so over size-ist comments. You too, JoJo? Let's move onto age-ism. Nah, that will work against me too. Stupid people should stay quiet. That would solve it.

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  17. I hope I don't become one of those "elderly" relatives.
    Heck, maybe I already am...

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    1. Not possible, Pat. You have a heart, and a brain. Courage too. You're the full package.

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  18. Our struggle is real, Robyn. I still think about that song from the 70s (I think), "Short people have no reason to live". Do you remember that? Great now it's playing in my head. I hated hearing that song when I was skating in our roller rink. Freakin' people. Love you my friend!

    Enjoy the rest of your week!
    Elsie

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    1. Oh yeah, that song didn't help. Did it? Thanks a lot, Randy Newman!
      Love you lots, hon.

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  19. Oh, I know you've been compared to the devil before. After all, I have read your book (and I do need to review it). Nice writing!

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    1. Aw, much gratitude, Sage.
      Yeah, a review would be wonderful too. The last one gave me a 2 and wrote "ok." I could use something to counter-balance that.
      Cheers.

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  20. I am five feet two and my cousins are all five six or five five. I took advantage of my shortness and was quick to try out clothes that did not fit them and ended up with a bigger wardrobe in spite of my parent's small income LOL

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    1. There are some advantages. Last night, I easily pushed through a crowd of hundreds to get to the front row (standing, dancing) and hear/watch a great band perform. Thank you, Munir.

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  21. So I have this "cube-mate" or "cube-neighbor" at the office where I work, and she tells me I'm "cute as a button" and "little duck" and "little petunia" on a daily basis. Sometimes I want to smack her and other times I have to remember that my mom taught me to respect my elders. But I have never, ever been told or heard that being short causes walking problems. Heh. Imagine that. I loved your retort to her though. You're awesome! #shortandproud #walkthisway #dontyawishyouwerehotlikeus

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    1. #peoplesaythestupidestthingswhenthey'rejealous!
      Thanks, Yvonne.
      Hugs.

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  22. Old people say the funniest things. It's already starting to happen to me. I might intend to say I like the bark on that tree but comes out I want to fark your tree or I like to bark up your tree or...
    Ah you get it.
    Hope yr having a great week - even for a shorty.

    xo

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    1. I say funny stuff all the time. You clearly do too. Smiles. But to say rudely bizarre somethings to strangers - that's a different story.
      Love ya.

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  23. Hi from Alberta , Canada ... got here via friend Sage ... will check you out for sure ... Love, cat.

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    1. Thanks, Cat.
      Sage is a good one.
      I'll be paying a visit too. Never met a Canadian I didn't like, and I'm part Canadian. =)

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  24. Sometimes it's fun, sometimes it's offensive, but I'm always at a lost for what these elderly are saying. Mine's always "When are you ever getting married and have kids?" I don't know what the big deal is.

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    1. Oh, I'm sorry you're getting that stupid pressure. Ugh. Some old folks don't know what they're missing.

      Be well, Lux.

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  25. Hahahahaha yeah good call to get outta there. :-D

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