I like to shake things up on IWSG days by mocking celebrities, especially rich and stupid ones. When I can make you laugh in the process, all the better.
We're supposed to introduce ourselves today too. But I've spent hours on this post because the formatting keeps getting messed up and my computer skills suck and I have to get up super early and it's getting super late... Plus you already know me, and I'm sorry for that. So we'll skip to today's guest. He's a scammer and a swindler who's bounced between bankruptcy and extreme wealth, and his hair is fascinating in the worst of ways. He's best known for saying "You're fired." This man's a hair-brained, racist, anti-Semitic idiot. Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a nice, warm welcome to Mr. Donald Trump!
Bold black = Robyn / Green = Trump / Green background = actual Trump quotes
Three young WASP blonde apprentices cheer, as Donald Trump enters the stage. He sits in a high-powered red leather executive chair, while Robyn plops onto a Hello Kitty Bean Bag and munches a $100,000 bar.
Thanks for visiting our studio, even though I couldn't afford you.
Well, nobody could afford me. I'm worth billions and billions of dollars. I'm very, very, very rich. I'm a multi, multi billionaire.
Yeah, so is it real? Of course it is. He clenches his crotch.All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me - consciously or unconsciously. That's to be expected.
No, not THAT. Your hair! Is your hair real?