And I Wrote This Book.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Bacon Hot Chocolate!? The Latest in Chocolate

 Add chocolate, a woman's first love, to bacon, a man's; heat; then drink! Does it work? I had to find out, so I purchased Redneck Cafe's Bacon Hot Chocolate at Cost Plus World Market. It's created and distributed by McSteven's Inc. in Vancouver, Washington. 
  I excitedly poured half of the packet into water, heated it in my microwave, sipped, and...thumbs down. It doesn't work. I tasted more bacon than chocolate and struggled, in fact, to taste chocolate. The bacon flavor wasn't right either - as if it was too fatty, too non-kosher, or had been left on the grill for too long. 
   Next, I mixed the rest with almond milk and heated it. That tasted better, sweeter and creamier. But it still didn't make me smile or sigh ecstatically - as good chocolate-bacon should.
   I'm not saying it's a bad product, and I drank it all, but I suggest that you save your money for a better bacon-chocolate product like the candy bars I reviewed in the past. 
   On a scale of 1 to 10, one being utterly disgusting and ten being orgasmicly divine, I give Redneck Cafe's Bacon Hot Chocolate a 3.5. It was a decent effort, and the package is kinda enticing. It was worth a try - if only for your sake, my dear readers. Wink.

Anyone else ever try bacon hot chocolate? How does it sound?

Have a sweet, tasty week.

88 comments:

  1. It sounds like a strange combination. Actually, I'm not the bacon fan everyone supposes me to be.

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  2. Not sure I'd want to drink my bacon.
    When it comes to bacon and chocolate, skip the middleman. Just wrap bacon around a piece of chocolate and enjoy!

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    1. Or vice versa. It's best that way. I agree, Alex.

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  3. Maybe you need to sprinkle bacon bits on the top of hot chocolate instead of marshmallows or add bacon grease to cocoa for flavoring.
    Seems a strange combo to me. But, I bet it will sell well.

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    1. You'd think it'd sell well, but nobody else was rushing to purchase this one.

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  4. Two of my favourite things but I think they may be appreciated more individually.

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    1. Yes. They ruin rather than bring out the best in each other - in this one.

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  5. You'd think rednecks would get bacon and chocolate right.

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    1. Haha. Ya thunk so. Too much beer ruined the taste buds, maybe.

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  6. Bacon's OK...I usually buy turkey bacon. My hubby doesn't like it in any way, shape or form so I can't even make recipes that include it (soups, egg dishes, etc). I'd rather just have the hot chocolate with some vanilla coffeemate and a splash of kahlua.

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    1. I like your drink recipe. Sounds great.
      I usually buy turkey bacon. Pork bacon is pure fat, but I guess that's the draw.

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  7. I'd rather chew on a chocolate-coated locust than drink that non-kosher concoction!

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    1. That's how you get your fiber, huh? Silly ape. Thanks for the laugh.

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  8. I sometimes wonder if this bacon thing has gone too far. But, as long as it's entertaining...

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    1. It's gone way too far off the deep end, CW. It's also entertaining. I just wish more companies would get it right. How can you go wrong, much less so terribly wrong, with the chocolate-bacon combo?

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  9. Well, if they ever do make a perfect hot chocolate/bacon mix, it will soon become the world's leading heterosexual aphrodisiac, I'm sure.

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    1. You're right about that. *Lightbulb moment.* I'll get right on it. Thanks. PS I'll share a small portion of the profits, no worries.

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  10. Redneck Café...I never would have imagined such a company exists :) Since I'm not a huge chocolate fan and I don't like bacon (yes, everyone, I said that out loud!), I'll have to pass.

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    1. I'd never heard of the company before, Martha. I don't like regular bacon either. I like turkey bacon; it's less than 95% fatty.

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  11. Ummmm…. no! I've never had the craving either. Sounds a tad too over the top for me.
    I love, love, love bacon.
    And, I equally love, love, love chocolate.
    But… I'm not letting them get married - and I'm not going to their wedding. Clearly, from your review it looks like divorce to me. hahahaha

    Thanks you for being brave and risking your tastebuds for us - for that you get a 10! :)

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    1. I wonder who would officiate the ceremony...Mayo? Peanut Butter? Bread? Maybe an Elvis Impersonator would do, since everything about this is illegitimate.

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  12. But how could a place called Redneck Cafe NOT have quality products?;)

    I love Cost Plus, because they have some of the most ridiculous, gimmicky things. They had a 'candied bacon' soda which was pretty terrible, and you won't ever get me to try this coffee that we posted on Facebook a few months ago, Absinthe Coffee

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    1. How do you find the perfect link for my every post, BnB?! And why would anyone think Absinthe Coffee is a sound idea?

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  13. that does sound like a Texas thing, but as much as he loves bacon, I doubt my husband would go for a chocolate bacon drink. Glad you are the guinea pig. I think I'll pass on this one.

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    1. It's an insult to bacon and bacon lovers everywhere, Joanne. Don't even tell your hubs about this one.

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  14. I did dip a crispy slice in milk chocolate - out of curiosity. It's tasty but watch the salt content of the bacon. It has a tendency to increase the sweet factor... unless you like that idea.
    For me, anything dipped in milk chocolate has potential snack power... except celery.(smile)

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    1. I agree that milk chocolate enhances almost any product, except celery and absinthe coffee (see BnB's comment and link above).

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  15. Ewww, that sounds vile to me. But thank you sooo much for taking one for the team and drinking it, so I don't have to.

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    1. Haha. No worries, always happy to make sacrifices for my readers.

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  16. Bringing home the bacon and sugar in one, damn, I was hoping it would be fun.

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  17. Bleah.
    No temptation. None.
    Chocolate doesn't need to even flirt with bacon, much less have a fling with it.
    Mind you, I am awed at the lengths you will go to for us. Awed and impressed. And grateful.

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  18. Hey Robyn,

    Oh yuck and no thanks. I thought deep-fried Mars bars was weird :)

    Gary :) x

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  19. At first I was wondering if the cocoa would have tasted better with milk, since I hate water in my cocoa, but I guess it really didn't improve with the almond milk. But kudos to you for giving it a whirl!

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  20. Oh that sounds like they got drunk one night and came up with this idea. This is yucky sounding and does a disservice to the wonder that is chocolate. I think I would rather even eat schmaltz ( bacon fat-ick. My mom loved it-wait until the bacon juice gets cold and white and the spread it on rye bread, shake salt on it and eat it-disgusting but German love it. I call it starvation food)

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    1. Schmaltz is an ole Jewish bubbeh (grandma) food too, Birgit. No thanks. It does a disservice to the wonder that is fat. Smiles.

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  21. I don't eat/drink chocolate/animals. I feel like this might not be targeted at my demographic. I support your work regardless.

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    1. That's very kind and diplomatic of you, Fredulous. Thank you.

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  22. I think I need a point of reference, what is "orgasmically divine"? Example(s) please. Thank you for reviewing this or I would have been tricked into purchasing this product. You're a pioneer!

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    1. Pickleope, see my link of the Vosges bacon flavored chocolate bar. Oh, oh, oooh. Sigh. Note: "orgasmically divine" has at least three o's.

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  23. Hi Robyn!!! I love bacon and I love hot chocolate but I DO NOT like the idea of a combo :)

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    1. Hi, Keith. Good to see you. Right, steer clear of the combo.

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  24. Oh no, I like my hot chocolate to taste like chocolate. :)

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  25. I don't think I'll ever enjoy anything that combines bacon and chocolate. Kosher stuff aside, it's just unnatural!

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    1. You're right, Elizabeth. One should not combine the pig with the delicacies created by the cocoa bean.

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  26. Dang, I was really rooting for this stuff! I was going to get some for Aaron. Well, thanks for sacrificing for us, Robyn. It was not in vain. :)

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    1. I was SOO disappointed. I kept trying to like it. At most, I was fairly neutral. Drats. Sorry to you and Aaron.

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  27. When I first saw the header, it sounded good! After reading your review, not so much...

    I think if a company or person sells a product like this, it better be good! Happy New Year Robyn!

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    1. That's the thing, Pat: if you're going to combine bacon and chocolate, you have to do it right. Alas, the Rednecks did not.
      Happy New Year!

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    2. That's what I thought! I was surprised it got a thumbs down.

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  28. Chocolate is my first and last love, I don't want anything mixed in it!

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  29. You were very adventurous for trying this. I'd much rather have marshmallows than bacon in my hot chocolate any day!

    Julie

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    1. Especially since Kevin Bacon doesn't like chocolate.

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  30. Just pour the bacon grease straight into the cup!
    Especially if it is maple flavoured!
    I feel the arteries constricting as I type....;-)

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  31. We took our son's family to a brunch where there was a chocolate fountain with the usually pieces of fruit or sweet bread for dipping. His family took their bacon over and chocolate-coated it. I'd never thought of doing that but it was delicious.

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    1. That actually sounds much better than this drink mix, maybe because it doesn't include all the four syllable words they add to this stuff.

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  32. I spread peanut butter on apples. Gives it a nice sweet-and-salty flavour.

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    1. Peanut butter on apples works because apples don't have a strong taste. Then again, that doesn't make sense. Peanut butter on cucumbers wouldn't work. Right?

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    2. Well I'm willing to try for the sake of science...

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  33. Both are excellent. By themselves. I used to like to drive fast and I also like a few beers now and then, but it's a bad combination.
    If you like a little saltiness with your chocolate I would suggest licking it off the skin of your favorite romantic partner. :)

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  34. I'm glad you are willing to try these things for us. I don't think I would be brave enough to attempt this one. It's good to hear it sounds like this is one to avoid. Bacon and chocolate together just doesn't sound appealing to me.

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  35. Bacon chocolate candy bars are good, so it would stand to reason that the hot liquid version would be good.
    Then again...
    Leonard Nimoy Actor: Good
    Leonard Nimoy Singer: Not so good

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    1. Leonard Nimoy Cross Dressing Comedic Trapeze Artist: ?? Out of this world.

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  36. Now the problem you have here is American Bacon and American chocolate. Sorry but both are very inferior to the British versions. It's the equivalent of Brits attempting to play Baseball or Ice hockey. When Mrs B is out of the house (possibly the country, she has a 6th sense about things so the further the better) I will try melting a chocolate bar over some bacon (She does not approve of messing with a good thing and she has still not forgiven me for the Hamburger marmalade experiment).

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    1. I don't know about bacon, but British chocolate...? Oh, my, delicious. No wonder you lot have such crappy teeth.

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    2. BlackLOG, thanks for joining this coversation. Between you and Al, I'm entertained for hours. And I don't mean anything sexual when I write "between you and Al." Ah, British chocolate. Can you believe I've never had any? Least, I don't recall. Marmalade on a burger, though, I've likely done. I side with your wife, though, it's unforgiveable.

      Al, do you think British pigs have poor teeth too? I wonder what kind of bacon they're adding to their chocolate. Heck, since it's not kosher anyway, why not go hog wild?!

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  37. I just read on Yahoo News (so the source may be suspect) that the Ayatollah Khameini has issued a fatwa against Bacon Hot Chocolate. So, you may want to to stick with Swiss Miss.

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    1. Al, is the Ayatollah still alive? How many Ayatollah Khameinis have there been? Ayatollah, I uh told ya I don't know about world politics. What's a fatwa and is it edible?

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  38. Okay, you know I'm kidding, right? But, the more I read that, the more it seems like it COULD be true. After all, there is a LOT of silliness in the world.
    Besides, the fatwa was against Kevin Bacon.

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    1. Oh, I thought the fatwa was against a Swiss Miss.

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  39. I'm just kidding there, too.
    Good grief, I should just stop.
    And get a BLT.

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    1. With a Swiss Miss on the side (or bottom or top - that's your call).

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  40. Don't want to be a buzzkill at this party, but bacon and chocolate do not go together. Ever. It sounds awful. On a scale of 1 to 10, it sounds like a 1. Or a 0.

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  41. Chocolates and bacon! Oh. My. Gosh.

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  42. OMG - what did you expect. Chocolate and bacon don't belong together, ever. One's not even kosher ;)

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  43. I don't like bacon (I wish I could type that smaller so no one could see it). ;) :)

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  44. An acquaintance of mine visited from another country and, knowing my love for all-things chocolate, brought a collection of "gourmet" chocolates from his local upscale chocolate shop. Chocolate with Sea Salt, Chocolate with Jalapeños, some others, and Chocolate with Bacon. I could hardly stomach a single one and found the chocolate with bacon indescribably awful. I wouldn't even give what I tasted a "1." I love bacon. I ADORE chocolate. But never again the twain shall meet!

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  45. Besides... Who would ever drink hot bacon?

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