Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Brain Quest: IWSG


Sometimes insecurities wreak havoc with the creative process. Because of this, Alex J. Cavanaugh  founded the blogosphere's one-and-only Insecure Writer’s Support Group. We’re posting monthly, exposing our vulnerabilities and/or offering support to one another. Please check out Alex’s blog to visit others’ posts. It’s a group of kind-hearted bloggers/writers, authors and great people.  Join us, if you haven't already! All that's required is an insecurity or two hundred.
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I'm winded. I've been chasing down my Insecure Self for hours. She ran off, saying something about a messed up brain. I finally found her at the local Walmart, Toys and Games Aisle #16, with Cranium in hand. Here's what unfolded:

Robyn: There you are! I've been looking all over town for you. What are you doing?

Robyn's Insecure Self (IS): Nothin', just buying a new brain. I need one. I'm tapped out these days. No creative thoughts, ideas, no jokes. It's all gone. I'm afraid it'll never come back, so I'm buying this (pointing at Cranium).

Robyn: That's not a brain, silly. It's a game. I played it once. It's kind of abstract and took too much work. What was Hasbro thinking? Put it back! We're going home.

A heavily tattooed blue vested Walmart employee approaches. Walmart employee: Can I help you find something?

IS: Yes, I'm looking for a brain.

Walmart employee: You won't find one here. He turns and walks away.

IS: Oh. Thanks anyway.

Robyn yanks IS's arm. Come on, we're going back to Life by Chocolate. They head home.

IS: But I've lost it, I tell you. What if I can never make them laugh again? And I'm 100 or so pages into my book, and I just can't keep going. I want to take a year or decade off, without losing any time. It needs too much *bleep*n work! It's taking too *bleep*n long! All the rest of them are cranking out book after book. They're always in the creative zone. Sigh. I just want someone else's brain. Do you think Alex will give me half a braincell if I bake him brownies?

Robyn: It doesn't work that way.

IS: Then I'll toss in some Hot Tamales.

Robyn (sighing, exasperated): What is wrong with you-me?!

IS (sadly): Chocolate's gone.

Robyn (with scorn): I noticed.

Robyn and IS arrive home. Robyn types this post, as IS collapses under the computer desk into a pile of pathetic whiny neurotic angst infused insecure mushy mush. Robyn looks down at IS: Get a grip on yourself!

IS: Okay. She clasps onto Robyn's right ankle. Robyn rolls her eyes, while decisively pressing "Publish." Next, Robyn logs onto e-Bay to offer a melodramatic insecure self. Bidding starts at two cents.

40 comments:

  1. I feel like Robyn's IS and my IS may get along, I'm the same as she is to be honest. Great post Robyn, it's a really good idea to have yourself interact with your hidden self, good stuff as always.

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  2. I think I could have written this post. But I think a lot of writers would feel the same way. =)

    And you're right. Cranium is too much work.

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  3. I actually enjoyed Cranium. It is a bit abstract but I think that is one what makes it a fun game. Your IS sounds alot like mine though- I keep taking breaks from my book because I just dont feel good enough.

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  4. For Hot Tamales, I'll give you my whole brain, but I have to warn you, it doesn't have many ideas either.

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  5. I think I know "Is". Great post, really enjoyed it.

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  6. Is sounds like quite the catch haha

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  7. Hi Robyn! My brain is on the lam right now or I would offer you-- Something! After all, you shared this funny, entertaining, and helpful post with us. ;)

    Bless you and happy writing!!

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  8. Well no wonder she felt so insecure - all the chocolate was gone! Go get some, problem solved!

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  9. Maybe instead of selling IS she could look on e-bay for a spare brain. If IS had one in hand, she might be less whiney (even if it was defective).

    I'd offer you my spare brain, but I left it in a locked drawer at work when I quit. I found it on the floor in the breakroom and no one ever claimed it.

    Lauren
    Lauren-ritz.blogspot.com

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  10. IWSG could just as easily stand for Immature Writers Support Group... that would be moi

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  11. Speaking of brains...
    I'll paraphrase the following from Young Frankenstein (because I don't feel like going to You Tube).
    "Igor, please sit."
    "Thank you."
    "No, no. Here."
    "Thank you."
    "Igor, did I put in Hans Delbruck's brain?"
    "Ah...no."
    "Then, whose brain did I put in?"
    "You'll get angry."
    "I will NOT get angry."
    "Ah...Abby Something."
    "Abby Something? Abby who?"
    "Abby...Normal."
    "Abby Normal?"
    "I'm quite sure that was the name."
    "Ah....do you mean to tell me I put an ABnormal brain in a seven foot tall, eighty four inches wide GORILLA!!??"

    Oh, I'm going to You Tube anyway. That scene cracks me up.....

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  12. Just got back from You Tube. Like always, that scene really cracks me up. I didn't do it justice here (the memory can be a dangerous thing). Anyway, I posted it over at me place, complete with a shout-out for you. You may be getting some company. So, I suggest you put on a tie (another line from that movie).

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  13. Over at "me" place???
    I guess I am now channeling my inner pirate.

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  14. 4th comment in a row from me.
    Because I can.

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  15. Poor Robyn's IS, it sounds like it just needs a vacation and some time on the beach!

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  16. How high is the bidding right now? I have a pocket full of change and my hand on the e-Bay "buy" button.

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  17. I feel your pain my friend. Maybe worse than most. I wast so much time...
    Love Al's response! Loved that movie!

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  18. Clever and funny! I think you've still got it! I feel the same way far too often . . .

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  19. I have the greatest readers! Thank you, all! It's comforting to know that great minds think - or don't think and get into a rut - alike.

    I'll be making rounds to visit you asap.

    Al, thanks. It's one of a few movies I own. A friend gave it to me recently. Now I must watch for the Abby Normal scene. It's a classic. Thanks for the reminder.

    Andrea, Ravena, and Tyrean, great to meet you here. Thanks for stopping by.

    Johanna, yes, I've had vacation on my mind - it's about the only thing my brain is retaining these days.

    Stephen, it's up to 5 cents now. Don't delay!

    xoRobyn

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  20. Fun stuff, Robyn! You'll be lucky to get two cents for your IS. I can't even pay someone to take away mine...I just put her in front of the back door as a doorstop to let in the night breeze. She's a good doorstop. :-)

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  21. My idea bucket has run dry too. I think all this heat evaporated it. Are you staying cool up there in Paradise? Maybe you just need to sit in a wading pool. That sounds good right now :)

    ......dhole

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  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  23. I'll take your brain anyday...it has a sense of humour atleast....an advice someone gave me, don't judge yourself by others....they may been writing for decades and publishing it all at once....some of the a book a month stuff is pure crap, I tell you. An average sounding book takes a six months to one year effort of polishing after the first draft at the very least. The better ones , you can imagine. Please get the book out before my 40th bday.

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  24. The day God was handing our my brain I thought He meant train and went for a ride. I haven't been the same since. Hi Robyn! Happy IWSG!

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  25. Lexa, that's a great idea. My IS hasn't sold, and it would be nice to let a breeze come in at night. Thanks!

    Donna, yeah, it's the three-digit weather. Sorry you're in it too and feeling zapped. We'll get our mojo back after August, right? I mean, yes, we will. And I'm talking about this August.

    Rek, thanks. Your comments always lift my spirits. I'll aim for your 40th b-day. You're only 30, right? Wink.

    Joylene, you're funny! Seems you benefited from that train ride. Thanks for the follow.

    Thanks also, Andy and Blindspin.

    Be well, everyone. Find a balance between pushing and resting your brains, and say "no" to Cranium.
    xoRobyn

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  26. Poor IS!! I hope it can get a break soon and come back recovered. I certainly hate mental blocks. I feel like I've had one for a few years...

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  27. Wow, 100 pages. Keep up the good work! The juice will come back soon enough.

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  28. I would be honored to have a brain transplant with you especially if Dr. Penwasser was performing the surgery. Our luck, Alex would be viewing from above, and drop in a Hot Tamale! Julie

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  29. I tried to play Cranium once. Blech. Totally agree, my friend. Too much work!
    Hang in there, sweetness. I KNOW you can do it.
    ;)

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  30. I think I am your IS right now. I feel the exact same way. Nothing's working and nothing's funny. I just got to listen to my own post I suppose. Though I'd much rather eat chocolate.

    WE can DO IT, my friend! Huge Hugs. :)

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  31. BabySis, it does feel like they last for years. Doesn't it. Argh. Thanks for understanding.

    Sarah, thanks for your faith and friendship.

    EmptyNest, I can picture the whole thing. Dr. P. is enjoying it all too much, and Alex can't believe he let that Hot Tamale slip...Thanks for your great comment.

    Dawn, great (or warped) minds think alike about that stupid mind game. I feel validated. Supported too by you, always. Thanks, friend.

    Oh Melissa, huge, huge hugs back to you. And do re-read your own post. I plan to.

    xoRobyn

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  32. Nothing wrong with your brain Robyn, but if you see hubby in the fishing aisle please send him home. Oh, careful, he likes to read the National Enquirer to people in the check out line.
    Funny dialogue!

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  33. thanks for sharing.

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