The Eating of the Ball: A Putrid Distraction

Dear Sillies,
   I'm really sorry for this, but I'm good for my word. My word, however, isn't always good. For example, I said "sure" to a friend's challenge. I mean, what could be so bad about sour candy? But even chocolate would not have helped.
   This video serves to discourage you from eating sour pickle balls. Is it too late? Have you already indulged? Please let me know.
   If you haven't, do not ever do so.
   I'm still recovering.
   Love ya!


PS The Jo/Joanne I refer to isn't one of our fabulous Joannes. It's another Joanne who's a nonblogger and probably doesn't like me nearly as much as I thought she did.

Trump Slammed by Xifaxan and Martha Stewart's X-Rated Fantasy Kit

Late breaking news: CNN just announced that Donald Trump's bowels are irritating and irritable, yet extremely liberal regarding movement in gender neutral bathrooms. When interviewed at a unisex urinal somewhere in DC, an anonymous source close to Trump stated this: "Trump has diarrhea and abdominal pain." Clearly, folks, the Donald is challenged by IBS-D, Irritable Bowel Syndrome with Diarrhea. Thus, we've very generously slammed his head-top with Xifaxan for IBS-D, rifaximin 550 mg tablets.  Will this Xifaxandoodoodoo stop Trump from being a poo-poo head? We certainly hope so.  

Speaking of irritating bowels, Martha's back!
"I'm Martha Stewart, and I like to fantasize as much as the next over-sexed *bleep* who hasn't gotten laid since the invention of the egg-beater. So I created Martha Stewart's X-Rated Fantasy Kit. This rather handy kit comes with  a dark and sultry mannequin with removable clothing and anatomically correct genitalia; a lit candle; and two voyeurs, because - really - who doesn't enjoy the thrill of exhibitionism? And now, if you'll excuse me...Martha shoves the mannequin onto the floor and pounces atop it/him. Jack Black jumps in to join the fun. Queen Elizabeth holds her 'I'm so over Commoners' glare for several hours. We won't  go into any more detail, but -yes- a sheep and small camel were involved."