Whence I Dropped the Big Matzo Ball on George's Lap

  Preface: Remember George? Me too, and here's an awkward moment between us. See, I desperately wanted everything to be okay despite our political differences. It's been five months since the break-up, so it's not too soon to embarrass myself with this scene. It's never too soon for that, I suppose...Enjoy.

  Seemingly out-of-the blue, George argued about governmental regulations and all the red-tape involved in running your own business. Or perhaps he was ranting about light-bulbs - that they're not the wattage or voltage or something as advertised. I don't know, but he injected the phrase: "damn liberals who want governmental control."
   "Everyone wants the government out of our businesses," this damn liberal countered. "Less government sounds good to everyone." There. I'd begun to level the playing field. I COULD be a relationship with a R...R...someone on the other side of the political spectrum.
   I continued with confidence and pride. "Stupid incompetents rise to the top in every system. And California loves regulations. That's just a fact, having nothing to do with the political leanings of those who create all the red tape."
   I was on a roll. Thing is, I don't debate well and I hate to argue. But I really liked George, and I needed to prove to him and to me that we could work as a couple. So I babbled about hippie-dippy systems and big corporations, about how slews of regulations govern all. As I heard myself talk, I thought: That's pretty damn good. You're making good points. But then I heard myself say: "And I love you." 
   Holy sh*t and oy vey! I'd dropped the big matzo ball* on George's lap, only two weeks into our courtship. Awkward.
   Within a fraction of a second, George appeared terrorized. He then continued, with calmness and control, and as if he hadn't heard the raucous matzo ball that could be detected by the rabbis lost in prayer at Jerusalem's Western Wall. "Now they have those energy saving bulbs and..."
   "Excuse me, while I go potty," I told him.
   I looked at myself in the mirror, my face flushed with complete and utter embarrassment. Maybe he didn't hear me? "Big, big matzo ball you let fly. Really big," I whispered to my reflection. Gulp.
  
-to be continued sometime.
*Watch this Seinfeld snippet for reference.

Veteran's Day // Up Dates & Latex

First, I always feel a tinge of guilt if I don't at least acknowledge Veteran's Day, and I suppose I feel guilty for having no concept of what it's like to be on the front lines. It's easy to say that I don't take my freedoms for granted, but I do. I've never lived or fought in a war zone, and I'm not in one now. Thus, with great respect and humility, I salute our military - past and present. In particular, thank you to my good friends, Pat Tillett and Al Penwasser (Ken Lynch). A meaningful Veteran's Day to all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Next, I'm dating "George." He works in latex.  Truthfully, George wears latex for his job...in healthcare. After I shared with him my Halloween Erotica poem, George suggested a date on Halloween. Coincidence? Perhaps; he didn't grab for my candy corns that night.

George is sweet, nerdy, smart and reliable--sort of a higher end model of George Costanza. While both are neurotic, this George exhibits a calm and steady neurosis. He's not at all dramatic. He doesn't carry a magazine cut-out photo of a famous model, boasting that she was his ex-fiance; hasn't lived with his mom since he was a kid, and doesn't have issues with shrinkage. Well, I can't say this for sure. We haven't showered or gone skinny-dipping together. I have good reason to not worry about this, though. Wink. Remember "the swirl"? Yeah, I'm glad he learned that one.

Thanks to my buddy, Bryan, this image sticks with me these days.

mostlyposters.com

While there are differences between Georges, they both know latex. We had this chat the other day:

"A lot of people are allergic to latex nowadays, so we have to avoid it," he informed. 

"What do they do about sex?" I asked.

"I guess they have to abstain or resort to masturbation," he suggested, factually. 

We both giggled.

"When I ask men who come into the office if they're allergic to latex," he told me, "they  very proudly and in a deep voice say, 'Oh no! Not at all. I'm NOT allergic to latex.'"

~~~So, with George in my life now, and with trying to finish my novel asap (I plan to have it written by year's end), and with other big (I use this word with a smile) things that have come up, I may be off-grid more than usual. My apologies. I'm not leaving blogland, that's for sure. I'm already working on spinning some holiday erotica.   Be well!