My Dear Sillies,
Are you doing alright? I sure hope so.
In an attempt to make us all feel better about ourselves, I've collected four of my favorite 1-star reviews of celebrity books.
I hope this brings smiles.
Be good to yourselves.
Hugs and chocolate kisses!Be good to yourselves.
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1) Martha's Entertaining: A Year of Celebrations ~ "This book is excellent as a doorstop."
2) Steve Harvey's Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man ~"Don't give 'the cookie,' as Harvey adolescently refers to sex, for more than 90 days and your man WILL cheat on you. Good grief, all that work just to have some egomaniacal sex addict around the house for you to wait on hand and foot - no thanks."
3) Kanye West's Thank You and You're Welcome ~ "He's dumber than my four year old cousin, and my cousin has learning disabilities."
4) Kim Kardashian: Selfish ~"They should print this on perfumed pages so blind people can hate it, too."
I like that one, but really appreciated this one from Dorothy Parker in 1928;
ReplyDelete'And it is that word ‘hummy,’ my darlings, that makes the first place in The House at Pooh Corner at which Tonstant Weader Fwowed up.
–Dorothy Parker (writing under the byline “Constant Reader”), The New Yorker, October 20, 1928'
What a spitfire she was. I'm very impressed, not only that she said this, but that she said it in 1928. You made my day with that snippet, EC. Thank you.
Deletelmao that last one sure did it for me.
ReplyDeletePriceless, right?
DeleteThanks, Pat.
Oh, that last one, LOL!
ReplyDeleteThat's one brilliant reviewer!
DeleteYes, last one is a winner!
ReplyDeleteBest review ever. She deserves an award.
DeleteThanks, Alex.
YES YEs on Kayne West.............egads, he should not do any public speaking. And certainly should not go to the White House.
ReplyDeleteHa! Yes! Even if he did nothing, it'd be too much. Ugh.
DeleteThanks for chiming in, Sandy.
Well, at least Martha's book is good for something! :)
ReplyDeleteYes, a good sturdy doorstop makes it easier to bring in the groceries. I'm sure Ms. Stewart would agree.
DeleteCheers, Connie.
Kanye and Kim deserve each other, don't you think? Can't see why anyone else would want them!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely. I fail to understand how those two ginormous egos fit into only one relationship.
DeleteOnly 90 days? He thinks all men are scum then. Must be one, too.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely. He is misogynistic scum. One of the other reviewers wrote that he don't once mention love in terms of relationships. It's all about the woman putting out, not being at all independent, etc. Yuck. I might need to bring him to my stage for an interview. I'm mad. He needs to be shamed.
DeleteKanye & Kim made a movie...Dumb and Dumber who have too much money and we should slap kick them to the side of the curb. Steve Harvey must gaze too much into the mirror. Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteHarvey is dumb too. And they all have even more ego than money. Outrageous.
DeleteBut your comment makes me giggle. Thank you, Birgit.
Glad someone else read them so I don't have to. Oh wait, I would never have read them anyway. Hope this will be a new feature, Robyn.
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, I'm glad you like it. Thank you. It was a late night decision and I'm glad it's an entertaining one. I think I need to keep it going.
DeleteBe well, Wilma.
Those are awesome!! lol!!!
ReplyDeleteReviewers sometimes come up with the best lines. Thanks, JoJo.
DeleteThe Kardashian one's a killer!!
ReplyDeleteIt's priceless. Isn't it.
DeleteHugs, fishducky.
We need more of these so we don't get talked into reading one. See what you can find on 'The Art of the Deal'. I know who didn't actually write it because he can't actually read.
ReplyDeleteI thought about that one, Jono. I just know we get too much on him. But it IS worth it to read those reviews, and perhaps share. Thank you for the suggestion.
DeleteBe well, friend.
Are these official reviews? So funny!
ReplyDeleteYes, they are. Impressive, right?
DeleteThank you, RH.
Perfumed paper. That's hilarious.
ReplyDeleteSo creative. That's a winner.
DeleteBe well, Elizabeth.
aww...."3) Kanye West's Thank You and You're Welcome ~ "He's dumber than my four year old cousin, and my cousin has learning disabilities."...hehehe...lol.
ReplyDeletehave a great day
I know, it's hilarious.
DeleteGlad you enjoyed them, Tanza.
Smiles.
Love the last two. I wonder if they wrote together? The genius coming out of that one room. Someone should preserve it in concrete....with them in it.
ReplyDelete;)
Hahaha! Brilliant, Anthony. Oy vey - what a duo. How is there room for their combined egos on this shrinking planet?
DeleteKanye and Kim, such a freaking sweet pair. Supposedly one of their love rites is going to a desert spa and submitting to their Brazilians together...oh dear, I can't really unsay that, can I? Oopsy! (I love you, Robyn babe, and hope all is well these days.)
ReplyDeleteGag! What a ritual.
DeleteLove you too, Margaret. I'm thrilled to see you and to know you're still hopping about blogland. Virtual hugs.
First one made me laugh out loud. And the following ones kept me laughing.
ReplyDeleteI'd better not write any more books.
I've made my own review (for, hopefully, nothing I've written):
ReplyDelete"This book should be available in two-ply and on rolls. That way, it will at least be good for something."
What do you think?
It's okay, but are you sure you want them to expend a second ply? How about just one-ply, Al? I mean, conservation is important. Right?
DeleteI am chuckling. Very good post. Poor blind people...oh dear, not perfumed pages.
ReplyDeleteYou are awesome!
As are you, my awesome friend.
DeleteGlad to make you chuckling. These still make me laugh.
Oops, *chuckle. =)
Delete