And I Wrote This Book.

Monday, March 9, 2009

School Daze

“Tag, you’re it!” They chased me around the play structure. They’re pretty swift, so I had to give it my all. After a few minutes, I tired out, and Danny caught me. Then he started eating me. He was a cheetah, and I was a bear. Since cheetahs eat bears, I was a goner.

“I love you to infinity and beyond, teacher,” proclaimed Nathan. Just yesterday, I was the scum between his toes. “I love you so much; I love you to the farthest planet. I love you to Jupiter.”

“I want my Molly doll! I want my Molly doll!” Sarah shouted. “Get her for me!” For Katie, it’s her pacifier named Mimi. For Jason, Buzz Light Year.

“Boys rule and girls drool. Boys rule and girls drool.” The lunchtime ritual had begun. “You can’t sit at the girls’ table!” “Trix yogurt isn’t healthy!” “Trix yogurt isn’t healthy!” “Teacher, they said my yogurt isn’t healthy, and that’s teasing me.” “No teasing, only pleasing!”

“Your stomach is fat.”

“Your haircut looks funny.”

“Want to come to my house to watch the Little Mermaid?”

“I want you to play with me.”

“I don’t want you here. Go away!”

“I peed in my pants.”

“I want to sit on your lap.”

“This truck is broke.”

“I’m hungry.”

“Tie my shoe.”

“Fix my hair.”

“I want purple.”

“I can’t flush.”

“I can’t wipe my butt.”

“Will you do it? Mommy does.”

“How can I, when I can’t even see my butt?”

“I miss my mommy.”

“Silly teacher.”

“Hi teacher.”

“Bye teacher.”

“Where are you going, teacher?”

“I have lots of trains. Watch me count: one, two, three, four, ninety.”

“Look! I’m writing the alphabet: I, J, K... How do you make a Elemeno?”

“Dora, Dora, Dora the Explora!” the girls’ chorus belted out their favorite song. Lacking something better to do, I joined in. “Stop! Don’t sing! It’s our song!”

I caught my first breath as the final bell rang. “See you tomorrow.” “It’s time to go.” “Please.” “Pretty please with sugar on top.” “Yes, yes, whipped cream and a cherry.” “Goodbye!”

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