Tuesday, March 10, 2009

25 Random Reasons to Eat Chocolate

1) You’re a female.
2) You’re a male who knows at least one female.
3) It’s that time of the month.
4) It’s going to be that time of the month.
5) It’s already been that time of the month.
6) You had a bad date.
7) You had a bad decade.
8) Your sex life is lacking something.
9) That something is sex.
10) You have one or more kids. (Note: Triple the quantity for each child after the first. Quadruple it for each child who isn't toilet trained and/or likes Barney.)
11) George W. was President for 8 years.
12) Like him, you’re not a Rocket Scientist.
13) Unlike him, you are a Rocket Scientist.
14) Like most of us, you’re wondering if there really is such a career path as Rocket Science and, if so, what it pays.
15) Research indicates chocolate has fewer calories than a steak and potatoes, plus chocolate.
16) The above remains true if you add a vanilla milkshake.
17) The Surgeon General assures that chocolate is less cancerous than second-hand smoke.
18) A bar of chocolate’s cheaper than a trip to Paris.
19) You could win the lottery someday and should start celebrating.
20) Get real. You’ll never win and might as well wallow.
21) Hairy nostrils.
22) Global warming.
23) Brangelina.
24) Life is hard.
25) It tastes good.

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